Morning after:

May 5 was Cinco de Mayo. May 6 for many Americans was “I’m never drinking tequila again” day.

 

Talk about the worst of times and the best of times: Baltimore DH Chris Davis went 0-8 at the plate today, then came in and pitched a scoreless 17th to get the win for the Orioles over the Boston Red Sox today.

 

Albert Pujols finally got his first home run in the AL. The Angels hope they each don’t end up as expensive as Zito’s wins have been for the Giants.

 

A former asst vice chancellor at UC Berkeley, has been fired after doubling the salary of her male subordinate,  17 years younger than she was, during their 15-month affair.    Well, I guess equality in the workplace does mean the opportunity for women to be as stupid as men.

George Lindsey, who played Goober Pyle on “The Andy Griffith Show,” has died. Okay, wonder who in heaven is getting that talking dog ready.

 

Men’s Health magazine has listed the “Smuttiest Cities in America,” based on the number of adult-entertainment stores and the rate of internet porn searches. And #1 is — Orlando. Well, guess dads have to do something after those long days at Disney World.

 

Apparently the National Christmas Tree located on the White House lawn has died. Waiting for the first Republican to blame Obama. Or at least Bo.

(As my friend Ian says,  just proves what they’ve been saying, ” Obama hates Christmas.”)

 

“Were Ronald Reagan in office today, some Republicans would start looking for a ‘real’ conservative to challenge him in a primary.” Another quote from a liberal, right? Well actually former GOP governor Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Chipper Jones, 40, is mad at Jamie Moyer, 49, for accusing him of stealing signs. I guess this episode is baseball’s version of “Grumpy Old Men.”

Charles Barkley, referring to Mitt Romney “We’re going to beat you like a drum in Nov. Don’t take it personally. You seem like a nice guy, but you’re going down, bro.” Sir Charles may or may not be right, but it’s probably the first time anyone has referred to Mitt Romney as “bro.”

 

Finally, Bill Littlejohn, on Jared Weaver breaking a tradition of not leaving your teammates during a possible no-hit bid by going to the bathroom in the eighth inning: “Thus, this becomes the first no-hitter ever pitched in relief.”

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6 Comments on “Morning after:”

  1. marc ragovin Says:

    Jamie Moyer has accused Chipper Jones of stealing signs. Moyer says its the most blatant theft he has seen since Jacob stole Esau’s porridge.

  2. marc ragovin Says:

    Jamie Moyer has accused Chipper Jones of stealing signs. Of course Moyer used to steal signs when he was younger. Most of them said “Caution: Chariots Crossing”

  3. Gary M Says:

    “A large sinkhole edging dangerously close to a central Florida home has forced a family to move out.

    “Orange County Fire Rescue officials told the Orlando Sentinel a resident spotted the 100-foot diameter sinkhole when she went outside to walk her dog.”

    There’s one family that won’t easily forget this year’s Sinkhole de Mayo.

  4. Augie Says:

    “A former asst vice chancellor at UC Berkeley, has been fired after doubling the salary of her male subordinate,  17 years younger than she was, during their 15-month affair.    Well, I guess equality in the workplace does mean the opportunity for women to be as stupid as men.”

    More like being as horny as men and willing to pay for it.


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