Posted tagged ‘Lieberman jokes’

Snow day

December 20, 2009

Snow has basically shut down Washington D.C. this weekend. Democrats introduced a resolution to name it the “Lieberman Blizzard.”

Washington, D.C. was blanketed in snow today. It’s the most powdery white stuff the city has seen since Marion Barry was mayor.

NFL games in Philadelphia and Baltimore have already been delayed 3 hours tomorrow by the snowstorm.

Canadian Football League fans have a one word comment – “Wimps.”

Actually fans in Edmonton, Calgary and Saskatoon have a question – “You mean people actually can play football without snow?”

Tag Heuer now also says they will downscale their Tiger Woods ads. The watch company’s slogan is “What are you made of?” – Future Tiger ads may say simply “Who have you made?”

Monica Lewinsky is trying to jump back in the spotlight by complaining now that Bill Clinton lied about their relationship.

Two questions: – First, is there anyone left in America who believed Bill Clinton told the truth about sex?

Second, if she really wanted to get back in the news for having an affair, wouldn’t it have been easier to claim she slept with Tiger Woods?

The #2 ranked Stanford women’s basketball team beat the #3 ranked Tennessee women’s basketball team 67-52. During the game Tennessee had exactly four assists. Kobe Bryant wonders how they lost despite that stunning display of teamwork.

Tennessee coach Pat Summitt, one of the winningest NCAA coaches of all time in any sport, has a reputation for taking losses seriously. Last year after an early tournament loss, she had the Lady Vols practice after their season was over.

Although aren’t the New Jersey Nets basically doing the same thing?


Myths and Urban legends…

November 24, 2009

Urban Meyer, coach of the Gators says he wants to dispel rumors he will take the Notre Dame job, and says he is staying at Florida “as long as they’ll have me.”

Or at least until Notre Dame makes him a much better offer…

But really, if Meyer wants millions to coach an overhyped, unachieving team with ridiculously rich backers, he should probably hold out for the Redskins.

The Indian Prime Minister, Manmohan Singh, will be visiting President Obama in Washington today, and apparently hoping for evidence that Obama values the “strategic partnership” between the two countries. Especially compared to U.S. relations with China. The short version of Singh’s agenda “Debt, schmebt, want to kiss your tech support goodbye?””

Governor Schwarzenegger announced his appointment of Republican Abel Maldonado as lieutenant governor on the new Jay Leno show. Democrats immediately accused Arnold of trying to slip his choice through while no one was looking.

South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford is facing 37 ethics charges . Yes, 37. Or as they call that in Louisiana, a good start.

37 separate ethics violations for Governor Sanford. Wouldn’t it be simpler for the South Carolina legislature to pass a resolution saying “You’re a scumball, please leave”?

This is President Obama’s first Thanksgiving in Washington, which means he has to officially pardon a turkey. Though many Democrats think believe Obama’s already done enough for Joe Lieberman.

Ah for the good old days, when appealing to your “inner 13 year old” mean the rock band Kiss, and not Twilight.

More about those amazing weekend numbers, over $142 million gross for “The New Moon.” And 80 percent of the audience was women. There were even rumors that of the 20 percent men, about a dozen were actually straight.

Christie’s is auctioning off a first edition of Darwin’s “On the Origin of Species.” They hope the book will fetch at least 60,000 British pounds. Although the number of people buying Sarah Palin’s book has slightly tarnished the theory of human evolution.