Missing Jon already

Perhaps the highest tribute I can pay to Jon Stewart is that it is now hard to imagine the news without Jon Stewart.

We opine about who might be the next Jon Stewart. But before Jon Stewart we didn’t know there was that position to be filled.

Tuesday – SF 49ers GM Trent Baalke “Aldon’s like any young player, he’s growing up, he’s maturing. You see that with a lot of these guys…” Friday – Aldon Smith has been arrested for a third DUI in four years, along with alleged hit and run and vandalism. So how about those Raiders?

The SF 49ers have now released their All-Pro pash rusher Aldon Smith. Too soon to start a pool on what defensively-challenged team will decide this young man deserves a fifth or sixth chance?

The San Francisco 49ers have canceled plans to allow 20,000 fans to watch the team practice at Levi’s Stadium Sunday, due to poor turf conditions and thus the field not being ready. And 40 miles north, it might be the wind, or you might hear the ghost of Candlestick Park laughing.

The turf at Levi’s Stadium is looking like a serious long-term problem. Fortunately the 49ers seem certain to give the field a long break from usage in the playoff weeks leading up to the 2016 Super Bowl.

Vanderbilt University has pulled a tweet with the football slogan “We Don’t Need Your Permission.” And they’re supposed to be the smart ones in the SEC?

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West plan to name their new son “Easton.” I see a new marketing opportunity with Southwest Airlines. ‪#‎wannagetaway‬

So last night’s GOP debate was the most watched primary debate ever. Now it’s making sense; more people tuned in to see Trump than were probably watching his “Apprentice” TV shows.

Who won the first ‪#‎GOPDebate‬ debate? Answer seems pretty obvious – advertisers on FOX News. ‪#‎ratings‬

John Kasich said last night that while he believes in “traditional marriage” he accepts the Supreme Court decision, and actually recently went to the wedding of a gay friend. Is Kasich trying hard to prove he is too reasonable to get the GOP nomination?

For anyone who didn’t know Carly Fiorina before yesterday and was impressed by her debate performance, three words: Google “demon sheep”

#‎UniversityofMinnesota‬ AD resigned after being accused by co-workers of groping and sexting them. Cue “Golden Groper” jokes. ‪#‎goldengophers‬

A belated suggestion for Chris Christie when Rand Paul slammed him for giving Obama a “big hug.” So why didn’t  the NJ Governor turn around and answer “Senator, when the President of the United States shows up in your state after a major natural disaster, bringing money and the Federal government’s resources to help, the question should be, why DON’T you hug him or her. Because that is no time for partisan politics.”

The US Coast Guard caught a semi-submersible vessel and seized six tons of cocaine off the coast of Mexico. Although they admittedly lost two more tons of the coke while trying to tow the sub ashore. Sounds like it’s going to be a high tide.

Donald Trump’s campaign now says they believe Fox News is part of ‘an organized attack’ designed to stop his ‘movement.’ Oh, this awful GOP on GOP violence. (No, I can’t quite say that with a straight face. )

In Michigan.  State Rep. Todd Courser was allegedly having an affair with Rep. Cindy Gamrat. Both are “family values” Republicans married to other people. So just your average political hypocrisy.

But now Mr .Courser is alleged to used taxpayer money to have come up with a fake email alleging he had sex with a male prostitute. The idea being to create a “complete smear campaign”, which could be debunked, and would then make the actual affair seem “mild by comparison.” ‪#‎youREALLYcannotmakethisstuffup‬

From my funny friend, Alex Kaseberg,   “A new poll has Eleanor Roosevelt as the top choice to be the woman on the $10. Of course Kanye West thinks it should be Beyonce.”

Explore posts in the same categories: baseball jokes

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

You can comment below, or link to this permanent URL from your own site.

5 Comments on “Missing Jon already”

  1. Lisa Says:

    The Courser plot to fake gay sex to cover up an affair with a Tea Party colleague? This plot was rejected as implausible by the writers of “House of Cards.”

  2. TC in BC Says:

    Locally, the City is after a resident to get rid of two pet goats named Freddie and George The Simm family are in defiance of a bylaw prohibiting keeping farm animals in a residential area. As far as we know, these are the only pair of goats in the Northwest not named Pete and Carroll.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: