Left Coast Sports Babe

Breaking news. A-Rod is to be suspended. And Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead.

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So when will ‪#‎ARod‬ say he’s going to spend the rest of his life looking for the real PED users?

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The MLB players union expects that A-Rod’s appeal process will not be completed before the end of the season. Well, the way the Yankees are playing, at least this whole circus shouldn’t affect the playoffs.

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As the Biogenesis suspension list emerges….a question comes to mind, so are American-born players cleaner than those from the Dominican Republic? Or just smarter about their drugs?

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A study of the first six months of 2013 by researchers at George Mason University showed that President Obama was the most joked about politician on late night talk shows, figuring in 288 punch lines. Finally, a race Anthony Weiner can win!

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Dutch researchers created the world’s first lab-grown beef burger, cultured from cattle stem cells. Volunteers in a public taste test said it had the texture of meat but was short of flavor. Sounds like they’re already met Taco Bell standards.

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Major League Baseball has doing about as good a job avoiding leaks on these PED suspensions as the players did in keeping their connections with Biogenesis secret in the first place….

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2-3 lanes of the Bay Bridge between SF and Oakland were closed this morning, when a big rig carrying rice and raw fish for sushi caught fire on the bridge. Restaurant goers tonight might want to approach any “seared fish” special with caution.

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Averaging about a home run a week lately, the SF Giants may be taking trying to prove they’re a PED free ballclub a little too far….

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Jeff Bezos of Amazon is buying the Washington Post. So subscription rates may go up but shipping will be free.

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Okay, now really rooting for the Detroit Tigers or Texas Rangers to win it all. Because I would LOVE to see Bud Selig grit his teeth and present Jhonny Peralta or Nelson Cruz with the World Series MVP trophy….

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Slapped with a 211 game suspension, A-Rod is appealing and plans to play tonight. And the game tonight was televised on YES – the Yankees network. Can you say ratings gold? ‪#‎Therichgetricher‬

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A woman who is the current Miss Riverton, Utah, in the Miss America pageant was arrested and charged with making and throwing homemade bombs from a car. There goes her chance to win Miss Congeniality.

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A corporate jet ran off the runway and through a fence at the Eden Prairie airport Monday morning. Did the pilot have dreams of working for Asiana?

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Stay classy Sydney Leathers. After filming a hardcore porn sex scene posted online, Anthony Weiner’s sexting partner stated “‘I’m not prostituting myself… It’s important to look at your body in a positive way”

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Rex Ryan is asking NY Jets fans to give Mark Sanchez a break. And fans are going, “sure, an arm, a leg…?”.

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Alex Rodriguez says that the “the last seven months have been a nightmare, probably the worst time of my life.” Well, he has more than 100 million rea$on$ to try to go on….

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The silver lining in the story that Texas A & M QB  Johnny Manziel may have signed a contract to be paid for autographs.  At least we know there’s presumably a college football player who can read and write.

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Mark McGwire, on PED’sl: “I wish I was never a part of it. If it’s better to have bigger suspensions, then they’re going to have to change it.” Translation, “I’m no longer playing, I’ve got a job, f*ck ’em.”

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This entry was posted on August 5, 2013 at 10:02 pm and is filed under baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized. You can subscribe via RSS 2.0 feed to this post's comments.

Tags: A-Rod jokes, Alex Rodriguez jokes, janice hough jokes, PED jokes, Yankees jokes. Johnny Manziel

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