One or two touchdowns?

All these scores Sunday – NY wins 7-0, Cleveland wins 13-0, Boston wins 13-0, St. Louis wins 14-3…. Did someone start the NFL preseason early and not tell me?

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Price – rocked, Strasburg – rocked, Hamels – rocked, Cain – rocked, Dickey – rocked, Verlander – , not great. So will today’s MLB headline be “Aces in the Hole?”

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Headline in Los Angeles Times – “Clippers sweep Lakers. Clinch division title.” Good thing the Tonight Show is moving to New York. This may have killed half their jokewriters.-

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My friend Darren reported tonight “So the fans in Texas are chanting “Take a drink” @ Josh Hamilton” Stay classy Texas fans, stay classy!!

Am afraid fans in Dallas are proving Hamilton’s point about it not being a baseball town. (Either that or they think they are in Philadelphia.)

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Barry Bonds is never at major SF Giants events like today’s ring ceremony, probably in part because the Giants don’t want reminders of the taint of cheating. So always a bit ironic to see Gaylord Perry. –

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Sen. John McCain doesn’t get the filibuster threat from other Republicans a bill for gun background checks. “I don’t understand it. The purpose of the United States Senate is to debate and to vote and to let the people know where we stand.” Sigh. If McCain really believes that is still the case, maybe he IS getting senile.

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Kathy Griffin’s show was cancelled. Shocking! Kathy Griffin had a show?

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Dumb and dumber. Those leaked Rutgers tapes of Mike Rice in practice weren’t made surreptitiously, Rice himself had the practices filmed. (So much for that “always act like you know there’s a camera watching” theory of life.)

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A New York City councilwoman wants to make it a crime to buy fake designer purses. Forget the soda ban, this is the law that could get women banded together in serious bipartisan outrage.

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Conn. Gov. Dannel Malloy said of the NRA’s Wayne LaPierre and his opposition to the state’s strict new gun laws – “He reminds me of the clowns at the circus.” No doubt there will be swift calls for an apology, from clowns.

-Condoleezza Rice played Augusta National today with Phil Mickelson. Was this the closest Condi’s been to a Lefty?

This entry was posted on April 8, 2013 at 1:15 am and is filed under baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized. You can subscribe via RSS 2.0 feed to this post's comments.

Tags: Janice Hough, New York jokes, Rutgers jokes

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