Left Coast Sports Babe

Rupert Murdoch is now in full apology mode, less than a day after insisting his company had made only “minor mistakes” in handling the hacking crisis. Rupert may lose much of his newspaper empire over this, but he has been offered a position as spokesman for BP.

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As the Murdoch empire phone-hacking scandal grows, Rebekah Brooks finally lost her job as chief executive of News International when she was forced to resign today. “What a shame” said absolutely nobody.

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Michele Bachmann’s husband Marcus is now denying that his Christian counseling business tries to “cure” gays of homosexuality. Guess that means they better stop referring privately to some clients as the “formerly fabulous.”

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So the Yankees have been beaten soundly twice by the Blue Jays – 16 to 7, and 7 to 1. Open note to New York players: The All Star game is over, you can start showing up.

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Now it turns out that Jim Tressel, formerly of that squeakly clean reputation, had been rated “unacceptable” in 2005-06 by Ohio State for “compliance issues,” and had a letter of reprimand only six months after he took the coaching job. Guess he and the school were doing a good job playing it close to the vest.

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Jennifer Lopez is single again; she and Marc Anthony have announced their separation. Which means for most American men, they have about as much chance as getting together with her as they did when she was off the market.

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No explanation given for the J-Lo and Marc Anthony split. But I’m sure some publication will soon offer a “behind” the scene report.

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Another in the “And we wonder why other countries hate us” department: At the Trump hotel in Las Vegas, they are now offering couples massages for dogs and their owners for $150 for 30 minutes.

(Said my friend Alex Kaseberg – Trump thought of this when he and that thing on his head enjoyed a couples massage.)

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And from my funny friend Jim Barach:  Tiger Woods says he will play in a rescheduled match for charity in August. Of course, playing for Charity is what got Tiger in trouble. Along with playing for Destiny, Cinnamon and all the other strippers he was dating.

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Dodgers owner Frank McCourt is saying he can no longer keep up the payments on seven of the properties that his ex-wife Jamie got in the divorce, saying she doesn’t need them anyway. I believe this will be known as the “A plague on all your houses” strategy.

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And Angelinos like to say San Franciscans are wimps. “Carmageddon?” Come on, dudes, deal with it. Not even as bad as a decent-sized earthquake. And with advance notice.

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This entry was posted on July 16, 2011 at 12:12 am and is filed under political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized. You can subscribe via RSS 2.0 feed to this post's comments.

Tags: J Lo jokes, Jennifer Lopez divorce jokes, Murdoch jokes, Trump jokes