Posted tagged ‘sean spicer jokes’

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Outta here

August 21, 2019

Baltimore Orioles just tied record of 258 for most home runs allowed in season, set by 2016 Cincinnati Reds who play at the Little League field known as “Great American Ballpark.” Mariners, Angels, Yankees, and Phillies are all on pace to break the record too.
But no, the ball isn’t juiced.

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How juiced is the 2019 MLB baseball? If Duane Kuiper were playing now he’d have hit TWO home runs.

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Houston Astros were one of the largest favorites in MLB game ever when Justin Verlander took mound against the Detroit Tigers tonight.

And they lost 2-1.  They also lost in extra innings as huge favorites to the Orioles recently.. And then wonder what the odds were when Verlander started WS Game 1 in 2012 against SF Giants and Barry Zito?

Maybe the Houston should beg Vegas to make them longshots to win the World Series?

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Sean Spicer on #DWTS? Because he has so much experience Dancing with the Truth?

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I’m so old that I remember when Ted Cruz falsely claimed in his Presidential campaign that he “had a president in the White House who has a messiah complex.”
And now that we have one who actually DOES…..?

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If Alec Baldwin on SNL as Trump described himself as “King of Israel,” many Republicans would complain the show had gone too far.
Yet Trump does it for real and GOP just shrugs.

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Trump this morning referred to PM of Denmark as “nasty,” to himself as “King of Israel” and also “the chosen one.”
At this point beginning to think that anyone who doesn’t think he’s pathological is themselves pathological.

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So where are all those in GOP who lost their collective sh*t over Obama’s executive orders now that Trump says he’s “very seriously” looking at trying to change the Constitution by executive order to eliminate birthright citizenship?
Asking for a country.

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The man who referred to Mayor of London as a “stone cold loser,” Justin Trudeau as “dishonest and weak, and to Africa as having “shithole countries” now responds to Danish PM’s saying his proposal to buy Greenland is “absurd” by calling her “nasty.”
Are we great yet?

 

So if Governor Gavin Newsom calls Trump “absurd” does that mean that Donald will call off all future trips to California? Oh please oh please…

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Are we heading for a stupor bowl?

January 22, 2017

Maybe Falcons ought to pay attention to things at Levi’s Stadium w/ 49ers & reconsider tearing down Georgia Dome. #curseofCandlestick

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Atlanta goes through stadiums like Donald Trump goes through wives.

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Sean Spicer & Donald Trump getting ready to welcome Jerry Jones & 2017 Super Bowl Champions Dallas Cowboys to White House #alternativefacts

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Look forward to seeing #SFGiants raise latest World Series banner after bullpen performed magnificently in 2016 playoffs. #alternativefacts

 

#Colts have fired GM Ryan Grigson after 2 consecutive 8-8 seasons. #49ers fans wonder if Grigson was fired for over-achieving.

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#SteveKerr learned a lot from Pop: “Sean Spicer will be talking about my Magic career. 14,000 points, greatest player in Magic history.’

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Lebron posts video comparing Trump to Batman villain. Popovich & Kerr also rip President. Guessing @NBA champions White House visit has been canceled for 2017.

 

Roger Goodell going to try to hire Sean Spicer to explain how these 10 NFL 2017 playoff games so far have been most exciting & competitive ever.

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A man was arrested for allegedly pulling a fire alarm in the Pittsburgh Steelers’ hotel early this morning. Wonder if he used to be a Patriots ball boy?

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Wonder what the GOP reaction to #WomensMarch would have been if even 10% of those angry women were armed?

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Waiting for first student to challenge a failing grade on a test by saying, I wasn’t wrong, I just presented #alternativefacts

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Wanna get away? At approximately 8:00 PM ET on Sunday, January 21, United Airlines announced a ground stop for all domestic flights due to an IT issue. #IblameTrump

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So which would be a better name for a band? #Alternativefacts or #PunchingNazis?

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Kellyanne Conway just said flat out Donald Trump is “not going to release his tax returns.” So congrats to those who had Jan 22 in the pool.

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from Ben “Mr. Trump said that though he had been “hit by a couple of drops” of rain as he began his address on Inauguration Day, the sky soon cleared. “And the truth is, it stopped immediately, and then became sunny,” he said. “And I walked off, and it poured after I left. It poured.”AND THEN……..he accused the press of missing the most important part – when he walked on water!

 

Beyond the #Alternativefacts  hashtag:   Chuck Todd on “Meet the Press,” asked Kellyanne Conway why Spicer called the inaugural crowd “the largest in history”, and asked “why this ridiculous litigation of crowd size?”
She responded “Your job is not to call things ridiculous that are said by our press secretary and our president. That’s not your job.” And then.. “That’s why we feel compelled to go out and clear the air and put alternative facts out there.”

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WikiLeaks is not happy. “Trump’s breach of promise over the release of his tax returns is even more gratuitous than Clinton concealing her Goldman Sachs transcripts.”
Gosh, if only they knew some hackers.

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Presidential tweeting Sunday morning. “Watched protests yesterday but was under the impression that we just had an election! Why didn’t these people vote? Celebs hurt cause badly.”
-Then an hour later. “Peaceful protests are a hallmark of our democracy. Even if I don’t always agree, I recognize the rights of people to express their views.”
Hmm, did someone on the White House staff “borrow” Trump’s phone while he was in the shower.

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