Left Coast Sports Babe

Raymond Parks, the last surviving founder of NASCAR, has died at the age of 96. In his honor, all drivers will race in an upcoming event with their left blinkers on.
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Giants baseball – A possible violation of the Geneva Convention.

for anyone going, huh? Friday night closer Brian Wilson recorded one of his trademark saves for the San Francisco Giants. Two quick outs in the ninth with a two run lead, and then four straight baserunners before he finally salvaged a one run win with the bases loaded. 42 pitches)

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Congratulations to Edwin Jackson of the Diamondbacks, who somehow pitched one of the sloppiest no-hitters despite throwing 149 pitchers, walking eight batters, and hitting another. It’s a little reminiscient of the girl we all knew in high school who proudly proclaimed her virginity, but nonetheless went to second base with a different guy each weekend.

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How badly are the Los Angeles Dodgers struggling right now? At this point their goal may just be to win nearly as many games in June as the Lakers.

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There are rumors that the Jacksonville Jaguars, struggling on the field and with attendance, may not survive in the NFL more than a few more years. If so, both the SEC and Pac 10 are reportedly interested.

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Sarah Palin, in California for a controversial fundraiser at Cal State Stanislaus, did not make any appearances of behalf of Carly Fiorina, theSenate Candidate she has endorsed. Apparently there were long negotiations on the subject, and Fiorina’s people convinced Palin not to do it.

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In Palin’s speech, she complained about the young people who dug up details on her speaking fees and other contract demands, referring to them as “students who spent their valuable, precious time diving through dumpsters before this event in order to silence someone … what a wasted resource.”

And the former Governor should know about wasted time as a student, after she attended her six colleges in six years to earn a bachelor’s degree.

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So now there are doubts about the truth of the story about Al Gore reputedly ever making unwanted sexual advances towards that masseuse. Makes sense, with all due respect, if he and Tipper didn’t have four kids there would be doubts if the former Vice President had ever had sex.

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USC has appealed some of the sanctions against their football team, but the Trojans accepted this year’s bowl ban. Translation – yeah, somehow we ended up hiring Lane Kiffin, so we weren’t going to one anyway.

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Volatile Chicago pitcher Carlos Zambrano was suspended indefinitely by the team for yet another tantrum and tirade. No one is quite sure what sets him off – maybe it’s playing for the Cubs?

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In the World Cup, Switzerland, whose defense allowed only 1 goal in 3 games, nonetheless couldn’t advance because they just couldn’t score in a 0-0 game against Honduras. So this may go down in history as a “Swiss Miss.”

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Linda McMahon, running for Senate in Connecticut, is running as an outsider, saying that as former CEO of World Wrestling Entertainment, she has had a regular job. And that WWE is “a soap opera that entertains millions every week.” So this is different from Congress how?

Former Vice President Dick Cheney was hospitalized again with heart problems. This must all somehow stem from his being born without one.

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Great joke I wish I’d written from Alex Kaseberg:

In the World Cup, Italy and France, lost and are out, but the US, England, Germany and Japan continue to fight. Why does this sound so familiar?

This entry was posted on June 26, 2010 at 1:04 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can subscribe via RSS 2.0 feed to this post's comments.

Tags: baseball jokes, Palin jokes, World Cup jokes