Posted tagged ‘Obama jokes’

Taking that home run title away from Barry Bonds?

February 16, 2009

Okay, so Bud Selig, the poster child for semi-plausible deniabiliity, is talking about stripping Barry Bonds of his home run title because of the steroids issue.

Fine, then we assume that he will also eliminate McGwire, Sosa and Rodriguez, plus then of course Mantle, Mays and Aaron because they played in the amphetamine era, and anyone before Jackie Robinson in 1947 because they played in the segregation era. And for that matter, women and booze could be considered to be performance enchancing for Babe Ruth….

So as we keep eliminating anyone with a potential strike against their name, does tihs mean in the end that the new official home run king will likely be Duane Kuiper?

(note to non-baseball fans, Duane Kuiper, currently an announcer for the San Francisco Giants, played eleven years in the major leaguers. In 3379 at-bats he had exactly ONE home run.)

It’s now appearing that steroid use was rampant in the last decade, but it did result in some great performances. So I have one question, how do we get steroids into Congress?


And what was the point declaring this a holiday again? Monday the government will celebrate President’s Day by doing abolutely nothing.


Wonder how long until we see this headline? “Obama has not fixed the country yet. Republicans demand impeachment.”

But okay, almost four weeks into the Obama adminstration, who would have thought that the Cabinet pick who has embarrassed and undercut him the least might be Hillary Clinton?


The NBA All-Star game was in Phoenix this year. Lots of scoring, no defense. In other words, Suns’ fans felt right at home.

With an assist from the great Scott Ostler, who commented to me that among golf fans, Tiger Woods might be bigger than Jesus. (Okay, he was joking, don’t send nasty emails.)

But hey, why not? After all to golf fans Tiger Woods can play golf AND walk on water.

In Rod we trust…

January 29, 2009

Embattled Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich just keeps coming up with more and more rationales and excuses for his behavior. Any day now expect to hear that he is simply trying to be a one-man comedy stimulus program.

Both Super Bowl teams are particularly excited this year about winning and thus getting to meet President Barack Obama. Right now, the Arizona Cardinals are favored to lose by about seven points. Which puts them right on track for a meeting with Senator John McCain.



Despite major losses in the last two elections, and despite the President’s willingness to talk to them, House Republican leaders told their members to vote against any stimulus bill Obama proposed. Isn’t this kind of like the team captains of the Detroit Lions telling fellow players not to pay any attention to the new coach?


The NFL has already sold over 70,000 seat for next October’s game in London between the Patriots and Buccaneers. In the meantime, tough economic conditions in the U.S. have the 49ers and Raiders thinking of sharing a stadium. Have they considered Wembley?


The Oakland Raiders are reputedly hiring Tom Cable as their 2009 head coach, thus removing the “interim” from his title. With all due respect, shouldn’t “interim” be required in any Raiders’ head coach’s title?