Posted tagged ‘gay basketball jokes’

Send in the clowns.

April 30, 2013

And so it begins. Tebow is gone but NY Jets GM John Idzik said today that all 5 remaining QBs will have a chance to compete to be the starter. If this keeps up, Barnum and Bailey’s will sue the Jets for unlawfully running a competing circus.

 

From Lizz Winstead   “Dear Homophobic Male Athletes: Wake up. Where there are gay men, there are always a lot more women.”

Exactly. And they make great wingmen. And they’re the only teammates you can count on not to hit on your wife/girlfriend.

Then this line from Ellen Degeneres:  “Good line from Ellen DeGeneres about NBA center Jason Collins: “It was especially hard for Jason to come out of the closet because he had to duck”
Jason Collins’ former fiancee says she had no idea during their 8-year relationship that he was gay. Well, he might be a bit young for her, but Manti T’eo is available.
From  reader Maaj.  ” Obama called Jason Collins “courageous” and Clinton called him a “good man,” while Kim Kardashian called him her “greatest challenge yet.”
#WillieNelson is 80. So assume he is singing “To all the girls I loved before. Though I can’t remember who they are….”

QB Geno Smith fired his agent Jeff Nalley after he wasn’t drafted in the first round. Guess Nalley didn’t show him the money.

SF Giants come from behind 2-1 victory tonight. In about a third of the time the Oakland A’s took for their win last night.

Bill O’Reilly said that Fox News “stands alone here in bringing skepticism to the president.” Jon Stewart has reportedly sent O’Reilly a package of Daily Show chopped liver.

Mitt Romney gave a graduation speech at Southern Virginia University last weekend, and advised them to marry young and have “a quiver full of kids.” And presumably borrow money from your parents to help raise them?

Paul Ryan says he has changed his mind after voting in 1999 for a same-sex couple adoption ban, and now says he thinks gay couples should be able to adopt children. Translation, Ryan can read the tea leaves and is running for President in 2016.

Stanford QB Josh Nunes is retiring from football due to “pectoralis major tendon” injury when he accidentally dropped weights on his chest while doing bench presses. Over at the SF Giants, Jeremy Affeldt has been told to stay away from the weight room.

Two days until the Run for the Roses. Otherwise known to most Americans as their only chance to down several mint juleps in a day.