Left Coast Sports Babe

Now even ESPN is reporting on the increasing problem with seagulls showing up in mass numbers during SF Giants games. Time for a new promo? “Bring Your Cat” night.

(An anonymous friend suggests “free shotguns for the first 20,000 fans”

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Former White House correspondent Helen Thomas has died at the age of 92. Whatever you thought of her politics, she had more cojones than most men in the job.

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NY Giants safety Will Hill was suspended for four games in 2012 for violating the NFL’s performance-enhancing substances policy. Today, the league says Hill violated the policy again and will be suspended in 2013 —for four more games. Yeah, but this time it will really teach him.

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Yoenis Cespedes was scratched from the Oakland A’s game against the Los Angeles Angels yesterday due to a “sore left wrist.” Not maybe what Bud Selig had in mind when he wanted the All-Star game to count.

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Signs that we’re getting to the serious part of the baseball season: 1. The All-Star Break. 2. The Red Sox and Yankees are back on the “Game of the Week” and “Sunday Night Baseball.”

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Have to assume that Kate Middleton is insulated from the nonstop British media coverage of the royal baby watch.  But probably her biggest regret about the early morning sickness is not being able to pretend she got pregnant a month or two later. Then she could declare a late August due date, and just tell  the public  “Surprise!”

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Dennis Baxley, one of the authors of Florida’s “Stand Your Ground” law, said that people shouldn’t boycott the state, because the law was intended in part to help protect tourists. “If you’re here with your family and you want to feel safe, that if you defend yourself or your family from a hotel invasion or if somebody [is] trying to carjack you, and you have to meet force with force,” you should know that the state of Florida won’t prosecute you.”

Should we rename it “the trigger-happiest place on Earth?”

There’s nothing like a dame. Helen Mirren, talking to the U.K. Daily Mail: “If I’d had children and had a girl, the first words I would have taught her would have been “f*** off” because we weren’t brought up ever to say that to anyone, were we?

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Mariano Rivera was cheered today in Fenway Park. A nice gesture by the Boston fans, but besides recognizing his accomplishments, they’re also thinking “After this year we don’t have to see him anymore.”

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Bizarre thing about this roller coaster death in Texas. It will scare millions of people out of riding roller coasters. And will make millions more more likely to ride them.

About 1,000 Montreal fans were at today’s Blue Jays game, with the announced mission of trying to get major league baseball back in their city. Amazing that they could still get all the Expos’ season ticket holders together.

This entry was posted on July 20, 2013 at 11:34 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can subscribe via RSS 2.0 feed to this post's comments.

Tags: baseball jokes, Janice Hough, Kate Middleton jokes, NFL jokes