Left Coast Sports Babe

Bill Maher once made this comment about the healthcare debate: “If conservatives get to call universal healthcare ‘socialized medicine,’ I get to call private, for-profit healthcare ‘soulless, vampire bastards making money off human pain.'” And recently Maher received an angry rebuttal – from the vampires’ union.

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Meanwhile, Speaker of the House John Boehner has declared that ending federal funding for abortion will be a top priority for the House during this legislation session. Well, that and overturning of the Obama healthcare bill’s new tax on tanning salons.

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Kobe Bryant is going to become the first professional athlete to set his hands and feet in cement at Grauman’s Chinese Theater in Hollywood.   Cleveland fans would like Lebron to follow him, although preferably with the full burial treatment. 

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Meanwhile Rex Ryan has contacted Grauman’s.  If the Jets win the Super Bowl he doesn’t want a ceremony for himself. But he wants to watch the next one.

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Kat Von D. says she’s the “happiest girl on earth,” now that she’s engaged to Sandra Bullock’s ex-husband Jesse James.  “But don’t you think you might have unrealistic expectations for this marriage,” asked Hugh Hefner?

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Scary thought listening to Joe Lieberman, we almost elected both him and John Edwards as Vice President…. Which of them would have turned out to be a bigger disaster for the Democratic party?

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Prosecutors have charged former Iowa wide receiver Derrell Johnson-Koulianos with unlawful possession of marijuana, cocaine, AND prescription drugs for anxiety, pain and sleep. but they dropped the original and more serious charge of keeping a drug house.

Why would they drop the charges when there was such a large quantity of  drugs found in the player’s possession?  Apparently the D.A.s office just wanted to follow NCAA football standards.

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The National Enquirer is reporting that Sarah Palin’s husband Todd is involved in an affair with a massage therapist.  And of course, if it is true, it would be beneath Democrats to gloat.  Although maybe okay to giggle if Sarah tries to blame this as usual on the liberal media.

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Groaner from T.C.  (And if you are too young to get it, consider yourself lucky.)

Groaner of the month for seniors: Carmelo Anthony doesn’t want to be a Net. Maybe he’d rather be Jimmie, or Cubbie, or Doreen, or Tommy or……….

This entry was posted on January 21, 2011 at 1:41 am and is filed under political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized. You can subscribe via RSS 2.0 feed to this post's comments.

Tags: Boehner jokes