Checked out

Yoenis Cespedes will have surgery on his heels and miss the remainder of the 2018 season. Making him luckier than Mets fans.

Marc Ragovin – “In a move to attract fans given their dismal record, the NY Mets have just announced Bubonic Plague Vaccination Night Fridays.”

Jerry Jones says Dallas will require players to stand for anthem, not remain in locker room. As if we didn’t already have enough reason to hate the Cowboys.

So just wondering, will Cowboys owner Jerry Jones close down all the concession stands at AT&T Stadium during the National Anthem? $$$$$$$

 

Kevin Durant on Donald Trump “He doesn’t have a soul, bro,” he doesn’t have a soul. The stuff he says and does, bro. Like, you gotta have something deep down … Something’s missing for you to say that type of stuff.”

Just guessing it’s going to be at least until 2021 until ANY NBA team visits the White House.

Vince Carter has re-upped for his 21st year with the Hawks. Your turn, Manu  Ginobili   #GoSpursGo

Larry Nassar alleges he was assaulted in prison.
“I feel so sorry for him,” said absolutely, positively nobody.

Just when you think you’ve heard them all, United flight delayed from LAX because “a piece of luggage got sucked into the right engine.”
Wonder if they’ll refund the checked bag fee?

FoxNews reports Trump saying HE’s delaying meeting Putin again until 2019 after ‘Russia witch hunt is over”
That’s like your prom date backing out and announcing you decided to ask her to next year’s dance instead

Trump says US and EU have agreed to work toward “zero tariffs.” Dibs on “less than 48 hours” in the pool on when he says the complete opposite.

Trump tweets about “hosting the first-ever #IRFMinisterial. The U.S. will continue to promote #ReligiousFreedom around the world.”
Of course, if you’re Muslim, your religious freedom stops at US border. #WTF?

So POTUS who’d run into a school to face an armed killer is afraid to face an unarmed CNN woman reporter….

“What kind of lawyer would tape a client?”
The kind of lawyer who doesn’t trust his client, for starters. @realDonaldTrump

Trump didn’t create racists in America. He just empowered them.

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