Left Coast Sports Babe

Thought for the day. With the U.S. unemployment rate around 10 percent, how come so many idiots still have jobs?
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Michael Vick’s agent said there is “no chance” Vick signs with the Redskins. Or as “no chance” means in Brett Favre lexicon – “definitely maybe.”

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But actually, lets take him at his word.

Michael Vick’s agent says there is no chance the disgraced quarterback signs with the Redskins. Yeah, with a record of scandal like his the only way Vick ends up in Washington is if he is elected.

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Brighter news from Washington, the Nationals are playing more respectably recently, and even had an eight game winning streak. Why, if they go 42 and 7 in their last 49 games, they could even finish at .500.

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The new UFL (United Football League) team in San Francisco is owned by Paul Pelosi, the husband of House Speaker Nancy Pelosi. It will be named the San Francisco Redwoods. Wonder where he got that idea? The trees are an ageless attraction in Northern California and even when at their oldest become beautiful petrified wood.
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On the other hand, the Las Vegas UFL team will be known as the “Las Vegas Locomotives.” Locomotives? No one has thought about trains in Las Vegas since Starlight Express.

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“In the new film ‘Julie and Julia’, Julie Child, who was 6′ 2″, is played by Meryl Streep, who is 5’6″. Who did the cinematography? Tom Cruise’s wedding photographer?

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From Bill Littlejohn , who gets an assist on the premise for the above joke:

Archaeologists believed that they have found the birthplace of Vespasian, the Roman Emperor who built the Colosseum.They’ve narrowed it down to two hospitals in Honolulu”

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Finally, I didn’t write this, and I don’t know who did. It was told to me by a friend from Nashville. If you are easily offended stop reading now.

Farrah Fawcett died last month and immediately went to heaven. God said to her, “Farrah, you have have done amazing work on earth, what can I do for you now in heaven?” And Farrah said, “God, please save the children.”

And God said, “Poof. Here’s Michael Jackson.”

This entry was posted on August 12, 2009 at 12:35 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can subscribe via RSS 2.0 feed to this post's comments. You can comment below, or link to this permanent URL from your own site.