Archive for February 1, 2009

Pre Super Bowl jokes..

February 1, 2009

Michael Phelps was recently photographed smoking marijuana. But give the guy a break, the man won everything in sight in the Summer Olympics. Maybe he’s in training in hopes of making the Winter Olympics on U.S. snowboard team.


Either that or he’s considering a future career in the NBA

Michael Phelps may lose some endorsement contracts after being photographed with a bong. On the other hand, he’s already fielding new offers from Krispy Kreme, 7-11 and Doritos.


Two U.S. congressmen want Citigroup to drop their previously agreed upon $400 million contract for naming rights at “Citi Field”, the new home of the New York Mets. They feel it is inappropriate after Citigroup received $45 billion in bailout money.

But on the other hand, nothing says “failed bailout” like the Mets bullpen.


T.S. Eliot said “April is the cruelest month. But for many American sports fans, February is worse. The Super Bowl is over, March Madness is still a distant fantasy and spring training doesn’t really get into gear until late in the month.

And for most Americans there is a sports quandry – do they ignore the NHL or the NBA?


The movie “Taken” was the big winner at the box office this weekend. Guess most Americans were curious to see how they got a movie made so quickly about the bank bailout.


Stanford’s womens basketball team won their first game ever on Super Bowl Sunday. (Previously they were 0-3) So whatever else happens this season, at least they will avoid the title “The Minnesota Vikings of womens basketball.”

Aretha’s hat..

February 1, 2009

The Smithsonian has apparently asked Aretha Franklin for her inaugural hat. Presumably for the American Museum of Natural History

Apparently new Secretary of State Hillary Clinton has almost $6 million in debts from her presidential campaign. With a record like that, maybe it would have been a better match had Obama appointed her Secretary of the Treasury.


When the Illinois Senate impeached Rod Blagojevich, they also barred him from ever holding public office in future. Which was probably unnecessary. Blagojevich has shown no interest in ever moving to Louisiana.

More fallout from Ted Haggard saying he is not gay but a “heterosexual with issues.”

Joe Biden has declared himself to be “taciturn with issues.”

The Detroit Lions a “NFL team with issues.”

And well, former Illinois Governor Blagojevich still maintains his innocence, and says that he doesn’t have issues.

Michael Steele became the first African-American chair of the Republican National Committee. Among those who he beat out, Ken Blackwell, the African-American former Secretary of State for Ohio. This election shocked many rank and file Republicans, mostly because they didn’t know they had two African-Americans left in the party.


Phil Mickelson has spent much of his golf career trying to emulate Tiger Woods. And this weekend he has succeeded, both of them will be free to watch the Super Bowl.

(note to non-golf fans, Mickelson actually missed the cut this weekend, for the first time in his season debut since he turned pro.)

Normally Mickelson doesn’t shoot anywhere near that badly in a tournament until Sunday.

In an ESPN poll, 53 percent of Americans think the Arizona Cardinals, outranked in almost every major category by the Pittsburgh Steelers, will win the Super Bowl. And we wonder how so much of this country is suffering for being economically unrealistic…


Of course, an old white guy from Arizona being the winning Super Bowl quarterback is about as unlikely as a young black guy winning the Presidency.