Left Coast Sports Babe

Senator McCain is getting mixed messages about his choice of Sarah Palin as a running mate.

But the most worrisome might be his call from President Bush – “Johnnie, you’re doing a hell of a job.”

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So John McCain figures he can run the country along with a young, charming governor with a slim resume.   And Dick Cheney says “You got a problem with that?”

John McCain chose Sarah Palin of Alaska as his running mate.  Among her other talents, Governor Palin is an avid hunter.  Let’s see, a vice president who likes to shoot guns. What could possibly go wrong?

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Apparently McCain was a little hesitant about Governor Palin’s qualifications.  Then his advisors reminded him that Alaska is indeed a state.

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Some people question Sarah Palin’s foreign policy experience.  They forget in Alaska you need to go through a foreign country just to get to any other state.

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Sarah Palin has a five month old baby.  Well, if that turns out to be a major asset on the campaign trail maybe Obama will wish he HAD picked John Edwards.

So on the night that Barack Obama accepted the Democratic nomination, the Cubs moved 34 games over .500.  So let’s hear it for those who predicted this kind of success for both teams from Chicago last year… both of them.

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The Democratic mayor of Minneapolis has said that he wants to get Republicans drunk during their convention so the Democrats can win in November.  And he is reminding delegates that the bars and clubs don’t close until 4am. 

Now we know why Bill Clinton was in such a hurry to leave Denver.

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McCain backers are running ads decrying Obama’s friendship with University of Chicago professor Bill Ayers, who was a radical during the 1960s.

Obama backers are readying response ads that go after McCain’s friendships, especially with the men who fought on the side of the Huns.

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A-Rod had a miserable series against the Red Sox.  Well, it’s still August but good to know one member of the Yankees is in post-season form.

Senator McCain is denying rumors he has already chosen his running mate.

Actually,  John has chosen, but he has forgotten who it is.

Former President Clinton delivered a rousing speech to the Democratic convention, one that went only a little more than twice over his allotted time.

Well, what did the Democrats expect when they played his 1992 theme song “Don’t Stop?”

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After last week’s gaffe on forgetting how many properties he owns, finally John McCain can relate to a housing crisis.

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In response to Barack Obama’s pick of Joe Biden, John McCain is also looking for a more experienced veep running mate.  He’s just having a hard time finding someone with Civil War experience.

If Bill Clinton doesn’t get over himself soon, people are going to say he learned his torch passing technique from the US relay sprint teams.

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Though following Hillary’s speech, Democrats are hoping Bill will come out with a good effort tomorrow…  You know, something like “Win one for the Zipper.”

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And Rudy Giuliani called Barack Obama’s selection of Joe Biden as a running mate “a big mistake.”

Well, if anyone knows about “big mistakes’ in picking partners, it’s the thrice married Giuliani.

The Colorado Rockies, eight games under .500, are only 6 games out of first place in the woeful NL West.  This may be the worst performance by a winning team since Bush and Cheney got re-elected.

John McCain is running an ad criticizing Barack Obama for not making Hillary Clinton his veep pick, since she was so clearly the Democrats’ second choice.

Wonder how long it will be until McCain announces his running mate – “None of the above.”

John McCain liked Barack Obama’s idea of notifying supporters personally about his vice-presidential selection. 

So his campaign is putting the finishing touches on a similar plan of their own.  Just as soon as they can find a few more Native Americans who are proficient at smoke signals.

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So far all is going well for the Obama-Biden team.  There was only one embarassing moment, when Barack explained to Joe that the vice presidential nominee speaking on Wednesday night didn’t mean he spoke ALL night.

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Many people still think Senator McCain is a moderate maverick.

But John has gone so far over to the other side, his secret service code name is Anakin.

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John McCain is now trying so hard to emulate George Bush that soon his sentences won’t even have a noun and a verb.

So now Americans have to return to their regular sports, and give up on being temporary experts on sports they only care about every four years.

But for fans of spectacular dives…there’s still hope with the Cubs.

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The Olympics are especially fun for fans who like to see underdogs come out of nowhere to win.  But now that they are over baseball fans are ready to get back to reality and another Red Sox-Yankees pennant race…

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And baseball won’t be a part of the London Olympics.    Though an Olympic committee may decide to reinstate it in 2016.   If they don’t, the U.S. is considering suggesting some other sports that we could do well in… for example, our sprint relay teams would love a “Dodge-baton” event.

Colorado is a swing state.  So while in Denver, Barack Obama will be trying hard to connect with the state’s residents.  While John McCain is still trying to remember if he has a house there.

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The Democrats chose Denver for their convention partly because they have hopes of winning Colorado in November.

John McCain, on the other hand, is hoping that Colorado residents will remember his support of their petition for statehood.

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Barack Obama’s campaign sent the text message announcing Joe Biden as his running mate at 300a.

Wonder if Hillary was awake to get it?

He’s been in the the Senate long enough to remember when McCain WAS a Maverick.

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If McCain picks Romney will the slogan be “Change from what we believed in?”

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This spring John McCain launched his campaign tour of the “forgotten places” in America.

Who knew he was talking about his houses?

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Well, now we know in the opening ceremony why no members of the US Olympic relay teams were asked to carry the flag.

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Of course, they have been offered spots in future A T and T commercials.   You don’t need to drop a call to ruin your whole day.

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Any truth to the rumor that the U.S. relay teams have been sponsored by FEMA?

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While watching Canadian woman Emilie Heymans win the silver medal in platform diving, we all heard the commentators marvel at how little splash the Chinese girls made on their dives.  Of course, the first step – start out being about 50 pounds.

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Four horses –  and their riders – were suspended from the Olympic games because they allegedly tested positive for a banned derivative of chili peppers.  Chili peppers?  Given the results for the Jamaican sprinters, does this mean jerk chicken may end up on the forbidden performance enchancing list?

Apparently Republican presidential candidate John McCain is not sure how many houses he actually owns.  Well, in the current economy and with the mortgage market this gives him something in common with many Americans.  Of course, in most of these cases their answer is one, or none.

Now that John McCain has embraced conservative positions on everything from choice to taxes to oil drilling, shouldn’t his slogan be changed from “The Original Maverick” to “Originally, the Maverick.”

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Or if he wants to borrow and vary a phrase from Barack Obama, what about “Change from what I believed in?”

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Who knew Joe Lieberman would turn out to be  the Hebrew translation of  Zell Miller?

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John McCain asked Joe Lieberman to speak at  the Republican National Convention.  His original choice was apparently not available, an old Naval Academy buddy named Benedict Arnold.

After winning eight gold medals, Michael Phelps received a call from George W. Bush. 

But after winning a silver medal, despite having a score that tied for first, Nastia Lukin got a call too, from Al Gore.

One reason that baseball may be dropped as an Olympic sport is that the best athletes in the sport don’t play because it is during the regular Major League season.

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Two solutions?

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Play baseball in the winter Olympics?  Makes as much sense as playing basketball during the summer.  And there are domed stadiums.  (Heck, the Vancouver Olympics could borrow Safeco field.) 

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Or do a modified draft.  Each team can protect 10 players, each team also has to contribute one player for a few weeks to a month.    For an incentive, the league whose players perform best could get say, home field advantage in the World Series?   (Not that Major League Bbaseball would ever allow their “Fall Classic”  to be influenced by what are basically exhibition games..)

The Canadian Olympic Committee asking their federal government for $30 million a year through 2012 to help implement its Road to Excellence program, so Canada can win more gold medals in London:

Wouldn’t it be cheaper and more effective to offer $10 million a year to Michael Phelps to become a Canadian citizen?

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Chad Johnson left a preseason game today with a possible injured shoulder.  If he’s out for any length of time will the Bengals receiver be known as “Oucho Cinco?”

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President Bush called Michael Phelps after his record breaking wins.  The President was particularly impressed with that seventh gold.  He didn’t realize in a tight race you actually needed to finish first to win.

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John McCain feels he had a good week while Barack Obama was somewhat out of the public eye on a week’s vacation in Hawaii.    But what McCain is really looking forward to is the next two weeks, when  President Bush will be on vacation in Texas.

NBC is getting great ratings on the Olympics.  Bad news for Conan O’Brien: the network is now thinking of replacing Jay Leno with Michael Phelps.

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And for the second straight Olympics, American shooter Matt Emmons has lost both the lead and any medal with a horrendous final shot.  On the brighter side, he has improved his chances of growing up to be vice president.