Posted tagged ‘Oregon Ducks jokes’

Duck, duck, goosed. Or at least Cardinaled.

November 18, 2012

 

 

Caption contest for the above?

 

Maybe they were expecting an Oregon-Kansas State BCS championship game?

 

 

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Forget Duck A L’Orange. How about Duck A L’Cardinal? Go Stanford.

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Apparently Duck hunting season started early this year in Eugene.

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Stanford is one quarterback substitution earlier in the year (and maybe one change of placekicker) to being in the discussion for the BCS championship.

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Florida Gov. Rick Scott said in a speech to conservatives this week that “the election is over. Get over it.” And of course his state should be done counting ballots any week now.

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A Northern Arizona gun shop owner has the following sign in his window: “If you voted for Barack Obama your business is not welcome. You have proven you are not responsible enough to own a firearm.” Wait a minute. Isn’t that gun control?

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Maryland and Rutgers are in talks to become the 13th and 14th members of the Big Ten. And we wonder why football players are bad at math.

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At the “Books Inc” bookstore,  copies of “Anna Karenina” with photo of Keira Knightly on cover are on the front display. Wonder how many of the younger generation are thinking “Wow, they wrote that fast to go with the movie opening.”

 

So after Alabama’s loss to Texas A & M, the Crimson Tide followed up this weekend with the powerhouse opponent Western Carolina. Can’t imagine how SEC teams get the reputation of playing out-of-conference cupcakes.

 

 

 

“I am pro-life, but because life is complicated, that choice is between a woman and her idea of a higher power. I believe if Roe vs. Wade were repealed, abortion would still go on. I care more about my economy, national security, and fiscal conservatism than I do about what women do with their bodies. It’s not my place, and I don’t believe it’s the government’s place, to make such decisions.” Maybe the GOP nominated the wrong McCain in 2008. This quote is from Meghan.

Ducks in the Soup.

March 13, 2010

Oregon running back LaMichael James has been sentenced to 10 days in jail for a domestic violence charge. And quarterback Jeremiah Massoli has pled guilty to second-degree burglary. Plus several other Ducks have been involved in “police incidents” this winter, some of them with charges pending. With all the different uniforms the Oregon football team has, maybe it’s time for them to add one with stripes.

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Nike actually manufactures all the uniforms for the University of Oregon teams. So considering the all those incidents and arrests involving the Ducks, plus of course the Tiger Woods story, maybe the company should change their slogan.

How about “Just do it. Just don’t get caught?”

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Actually the problem might be taking that “Just Do It” a little too literally. Another idea. “Just Think Before You Just Do It?”

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From Stanford coach Jim Harbaugh’s point of view this is got to be interesting. Oregon quarterback Jeremiah Massoli has now been suspended for a year after pleading guilty to burglary charges. And USC’s status is still up in the air between the NCAA investigation and the arrival of Lane Kiffin. A few more scandals and Cardiinal could find themselves a frontrunner for the Rose Bowl.

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76 Gasoline is running a commercial about a hypothetical “Ticket Talker,” a phone app that will provide you with a number of excuses for getting out of a speeding ticket. But they forgot the easiest one “Officer, it’s a Toyota.”

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Even though Gavin Newsom is running for lieutenant governor, he still wishes that his name would be on the ballot this fall as the Democratic nominee for governor. You know what, so does Meg Whitman.

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From Bill Littlejohn again: The Amy Winehouse Clothing Collection is coming in the fall.The Personal Property Department at Scotland Yard apologized for the delay

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Utah House majority leader Kevin Garn has admitted that 25 years ago when he was 28, he was naked in a hot tub with a 15-year-old girl, and paid her to keep quiet about it. His fellow Republicans in the state can’t decide whether to be shocked, or just grateful that it was a girl.


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