Posted tagged ‘Janice Hough’

Flowing robes.

September 24, 2015

Pope-mania has really taken hold in the U.S. Nice to see the country so excited about an older person in a skirt who isn’t Caitlyn Jenner.

Pope Francis’s visit and the resulting security has meant many businesses just closing for a few days. Waiting for the first GOP candidate to complain about another immigrant hurting American jobs.

The original CSI is finally coming to an end Sunday with a 2 hour finale, after 15 years. Guess they didn’t wanted to change the title to “CSI – Assisted Living.”

After Elton John was pranked earlier this month he now got a REAL call from the Russian President. Have to wonder if the singer’s initial response this time was. “Are you Putin me on?”

The NBA has promised that for next year’s Finals, they will mandate at least two days between games any time teams have to change cities. So expect the 2016 champion to be crowned about the 4th of July.

They’re expecting gridlock in Manhattan because of the Pope’s visit. Or as New Yorkers call it, Friday.

Supreme Court judges Scalia, Alito and Thomas skipped the Pope’s address to Congress. Well, it’s not like they are Catholic or anything. Oops, never mind….

Tom Brady’s jersey is the number one seller in the NFL this year. That’s really going to inflate his ego.

For the first time in a decade, the number of children in foster care in the U.S has risen, and is now over 415,000. You’d think maybe just a few of these “pro-life” types would spend time and money on trying to help them….

Republicans are so sure they will hold Congress and win the White House in 2016, wouldn’t you think that they’d maybe ease up on this minority-shutting-down-the-government concept, so as not to give Democrats ideas?

In Texas, with the case where two football players attacked a referee, the University Interscholastic League, which is in charge of high school sports, says they are not making any decisions about punishments at least until they can hold another hearing next month.

Sounds like they learned their concept of swift justice from the NFL.

Bill Littlejohn.  “An extra point kicked by Midland Lee High School (TX) bounced off of a referee’s head and went through the uprights.  So was the ref any relation to Jose Canseco?”

Artificial intelligence.

September 23, 2015

Martin Shkreli, who announced plans to raise the price of an AIDS drug from $13,50 to $750 a pill, is CEO of Turing Technologies.  Not sure how he named the company, but oddly enough, the “Turing test” is a test of a machine’s ability to exhibit intelligent behavior equivalent to, or indistinguishable from, that of a human.

Shkreli failed.

The CEO of Volkswagen has resigned. Guessing soon he’ll have the rare opportunity to be making license plates for his own cars.

A DC man has started a petition “Dear Pope Francis. Our Metro system is having some troubles. All of DC would be grateful if you could find the time to bless it during your upcoming stay. Maybe a Papal Blessing is just what it needs.”

Hmm, any chance he could also have the Pope bless Congress?

The Blue Jays won tonight to push their AL East lead over the Yankees to 3.5 game. So how long until some GOP candidate blames a potential Toronto win on Obama’s failure to maintain American supremacy?

Anne Hathaway says now that it was hard to be taken seriously as an actress after “The Princess Diaries.” Just thinking she’s not going to get too much sympathy from her co-star Julie Andrews.

Donald Trump says Fox News has been treating him “very unfairly”, and he’s done appearing on Fox News shows for the “foreseeable future.” Well, to be fair, the Donald is really a better fit for Comedy Central.

Mike Huckabee said today that President Obama is just “pretending to be a Christian. I’m thinking at this point that Huckabee is just pretending to be a plausible human being.

Now it’s ‪#‎Adrianza‬ who joins ‪#‎Belt‬ and ‪#‎Aoki‬ on the ‪#‎SFGiants‬ concussion list. Who expected ‪#‎Giants‬ to have more concussions than ‪#‎49ers‬?

Well, at this point if the ‪#‎SFGIants‬ ended up in the post season they probably couldn’t field a healthy 25 man roster.

The SF Chronicle is reporting that the SF Board of Supervisors is about to pass an ordinance that would make “strict enforcement of stop signs for cyclists the lowest priority for the SFPD”
And many cyclists in San Francisco are thinking “What stop signs?”

QB Colin Kaepernick, praising new SF coach Tomsula, says that this year is “a comfort zone for me. It’s a situation where I’m not being asked to do things outside of my character.”
Because Jim is a nice guy, or because the 49ers have designs on drafting high enough to get Jared Goff?

A terminal in Amsterdam’s Schiphol airport was evacuated over what turned out to be an iPhone in a gun shaped case. Not sure what the owner of the phone will be charged with, but assume included will be felony criminal stupidity.

R.I.P Yogi Berra. Nobody goes to heaven anymore, it’s too crowded.

Another sad thing for some about the death of ‪#‎YogiBerra‬. We can probably retire the phrase “Beloved ‪#‎Yankee‬.”

Sinister thoughts

September 21, 2015

In an Oklahoma school, a pre-K student was allegedly forced to write with his right hand and sent home with a note about the “evil” of being left-handed. Waiting for Mike Huckabee or someone to make this about Christianity and religious freedom.

Mike Huckabee and some other conservatives ARE upset that, among the 15,000 people Obama has invited to an event for Pope Francis, are a handful of LGBT Catholics and even pro-choice Catholics.

You know who isn’t upset about their inclusion? The Pope.

A tourist died and another broke his leg when they fell down a staircase taking selfies at the Taj Mahal. If Darwin were alive he might have to revise his book to add a whole chapter on selfie-sticks.

If we could just create a combination gun and selfie-stick, we could cull the herd a lot faster.

Scott Walker is dropping out of the Presidential race. So bad news, Wisconsin, for the next few years you’re stuck with him.

When the Seahawks beat the Packers in the 2015 NFC Championship, Russell WIlson credited God. And Aaron Rodgers said he didn’t think God “cares a whole lot about the outcome.” But after last night’s Packers win, Rodgers said ” I think God was a Packers fan tonight, so he was taking care of us.”
You never know.. Hey, maybe Jesus had money on Green Bay.

Scott Walker said Monday he was “called” to drop out of the race. And God said “Wasn’t me, I was watching the Packers-Seahawks.”

A Georgia peanut executive was sentenced to 28 years in prison today for knowingly shipping salmonella-tainted peanut butter, which resulted in hundreds of people getting sick, and at least nine deaths. Wouldn’t it be more appropriate just to sentence him to eating his own peanut butter.

SNL‬ has picked  Taran Killi‪am to play ‪Donald Trump. But who’s going to play that furry thing that lives on Trump’s head?

After a Vikings fan was beaten after the first game at Levi’s, two Santa Clara City Council members have suggested that the city ban alcohol from the stadium. And 49ers fans are screaming, “Ban booze? Did you see the team against the Steelers, how else are we going to get through the rest of the season?”

Both Ted Cruz AND Hillary Clinton rebuked Ben Carson’s comment on a Muslim president by invoking the Constitution

So Clinton and Cruz agree. Now which of them will be the first to have a campaign event with flying pigs?

And here, for Dr. Ben Carson, since civics was clearly not required for your medical school education. The U.S. Constitution, Article VI: “The Senators and Representatives before mentioned, and the Members of the several State Legislatures, and all executive and judicial Officers, both of the United States and of the several States, shall be bound by Oath or Affirmation, to support this Constitution; but no religious Test shall ever be required as a Qualification to any Office or public Trust under the United States.”

Bus to Hell time:  Monday, Sept 21 is World Alzheimer’s Day. Awful disease, but at least you can use the same greeting card every year.

The NFL keeps talking about wanting to reduce injuries. Here’s a simple way to cut them down drastically: Any player who receives a penalty for a play that injures another has to sit until that injured player returns. Up to and including missing the rest of the season.

We some of the people?

September 20, 2015

Ben Carson said he doesn’t think a Muslim should ever be President, because the religion isn’t “consistent with the constitution.” Well, actually, Dr. Carson, expecting Americans to follow ANY religion isn’t consistent with the constitution.

Okay, who had both ‪#‎Stanford‬ & the ‪#‎Raiders‬ winning this weekend in football? Now all of you liars put your hands down.

Right about now ‪#‎JohnHarbaugh‬ has to be thinking of calling brother ‪#‎jimharbaugh‬ & asking how to join the college coaching ranks. ‪#‎BALvsOak‬

Marco Rubio on Obama “He’s born in the United States. He’s a Christian. He’s the president of the United States for the next year and a half and we’re going to move on.” Uh oh, if Rubio doesn’t watch out he’s going to lose that all important crazy vote.

Hillary Clinton is now saying she’s a “real person,”  who can “talk about anything and everything – from the Kardashians to wonky climate change policy.”

Were those the best choices.  While the overlap between the two groups is small, a lot of Americans don’t believe in at least one of those examples.

So after beating ‪#‎NIU‬ by 7, ‪#‎OhioState‬ strengthens their hold on #1 in ‪#‎APTop25‬. Shouldn’t the Huskies thus be at least in top 20?

An Alabama wide receiver tweeted “For the second straight year, we will be in the college football playoff and Ole Miss won’t. Bama isn’t going anywhere.” Uh, AFTER Ole Miss won. ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬ ‪#‎cantdomatheither‬

The NY Post reports that New York City custodians took home an average pay of $109,467 in the 2013-14 school year. That’s almost enough to afford a studio apartment in Manhattan.

Scary that this year it looks like the ‪#‎NYJets‬ might be the less dysfunctional NFL team in New York? ‪#‎NYGiants‬

Now some conservatives are claiming that Ahmed Mohamed really didn’t build a block and it was all a fraud to get attention, or worse, a “dry run” for a Muslim kid bringing a bomb to school. Sigh.
The boy would have been fine if he had just acted like a real Texan and built a gun

Chris Christie, a Catholic, today on Pope Francis saying the U.S. and Cuba should restore relations: “I just think the pope is wrong. The fact is that his infallibility is on religious matters, not on political ones.”

Uh, wait, for the GOP aren’t religion and politics supposed to be the same thing?

Any given Saturday?

September 19, 2015

Stanford’s road to the Royal Purple Las Vegas Bowl might have hit a  speed bump tonight.

‪#‎Fearthetree‬ ‪#‎Nerdnation‬ ‪#‎GoStanford‬. “Saw this coming” said NOBODY. ‪#‎STANvsUSC‬

Headline you didn’t expect to see- “Ohio State holds off Northern Illinois, 20-13.” Sounds like the Buckeyes’ players took this game about as seriously as they take their classes.

Notre Dame won today but safety Drue Tranquill injured his right knee chest-bumping a teammate after breaking up a pass in the first half. So Touchdown Jesus may be backing the Fighting Irish, but Mean Bitch Karma still doesn’t like showboating.

Author Jackie Collins has passed away at 77. And millions of women are thinking, “How sad.” Millions of men are going “Who?”

Marshawn Lynch filmed an entire Pepsi ad without speaking. Out of habit Roger Goodell fined him.

In New York City, authorities have closed a child-care center after staff members were accused of accidentally leaving a 2-year-old-boy at a playground. Apparently they just miscounted the children. Yeah, who really needs math anyway?

Donald Trump just released a policy paper saying he wants to end bans on certain gun types, and that he supports nationwide concealed carry permits. Fine. Can the Donald start by allowing concealed carry at all his campaign events?

A 91-year-old Florida man, Max Horton, was arrested for allegedly shooting at his neighbors’ landscapers because they got lawn clippings on his caregivers car. In 2013, he was accused of threatening Florida Hospital staffers, telling them he had a gun in his car and they’d be sorry if he went to get it. And this time police said, while being taken to jail, Horton also allegedly threatened to get “payback” on his neighbors.
Thinking this is not what our forefathers meant by a well-regulated militia

Guess Sarah Palin couldn’t let her daughter have all the headlines, so she too is ranting over Ahmed Mohamed, saying the boy is an “obstinate-answering student” (say what?) , and that his device “obviously could be seen by conscientious teachers as a dangerous wired-up bomb-looking contraption.” Adding “Right, if that’s a clock, I’m the Queen of England.”
So in addition to everything else Sarah has delusions of royalty?

Trump says “I am not morally obligated” to correct a man who claimed Obama was a Muslim. Uh, Trump was correct after the first 11 letters.

A shocking upset in the rugby World Cup, as Japan upset South Africa. Shocking the Japanese especially. “We have a rugby team?

A new iiPhone app will tell users how much time they have wasted playing games and checking social media. So will the app also have the ability to check how much time you waste checking it?


My friend Owen Byrd shares this tweet from @JaymayAllDay – ‪#‎wishIhadsaidthis‬ : “If Carly Fiorina really wants to destroy Planned Parenthood, she should become its CEO.”

Numbers game?

September 17, 2015

We don’t need no stinkin’ DH.  #SFGiants


Leaving aside the illegality of it, does Jeb Bush’s response of “Maggie Thatcher” for a woman to be on the $10 bill mean he can’t think of ONE worthy American woman? ‪#‎andhessupposedtobethesmartone

Jeb Bush tonight admitted to smoking marijuana 40 years ago, “other people might have done it but may not want to say it in front of 25 million people. My mom’s not happy that I just did.” Wow. Jeb smoked pot. And somewhere Barbara is thinking of his brother and just giggling.

Over 22 million people tuned into CNN’s debate last night. Well, if all it takes is an outspoken entertainer as part of the show to get people’s attention, can we include Jon Stewart or Bill Maher in the Democratic debate?

My friend Michael Powers noted this quote from Marco Rubio during the GOP debate: “These problems cannot be solved by intellect.”

Well, then that’s not an issue for most anyone who was on that stage.

Apparently Kobe Bryant’s torn rotator cuff has healed enough so that he has been cleared to participate in basketball activities. Well, and it’s not like he’ll need to use the shoulder to pass or anything.

American Airlines had a “technical issue” today that halted flights for about an hour at DFW, Miami, and O’Hare., their three main hubs.
How come it’s a “technical issue” when they have a problem, and at least a $200 change fee when YOU have a problem?


Bengals kicker Mike Nugent is upset about the NFL making the PAT attempt longer.: “I don’t like the rule because — I could be wrong — but I don’t know of any rules that have been changed to make guys fail more.”

Well, two things. 1. Making “guys fail more” IS exactly the point. 2. Any rules, well, let’s start with lowering the MLB mound in 1969. And then there’s moving the kickoff, and the goalposts, and, well, I am sure my friends and readers have a long list.

Anthony Weiner has lost his job he started in July at that fancy PR firm. So congrats to all those who had Sept 16 in the pool.

Ann Coulter is facing more than the usual bipartisan criticism after she tweeted during the GOP debate “How many f–ing Jews do these people think there are in the United States?” Maybe she forgot that one of those Jews is Sheldon Adelson?

Defensive lineman Jonathan Taylor has been dismissed from both Alabama and Georgia for a total of three arrests, two for domestic violence, Now Taylor has enrolled at Southeastern Louisiana and joined the football team. Well, a guy’s got to do something before he joins the NFL.

The Coolidge, AZ, City Council voted Monday to allow prayers before council meetings, including a stipulation that they be Christian. Where are the GOP defenders of freedom of religion on this one?

Pitcher Mat ‪#‎Latos‬ made much of hating ‪#‎SF‬. Can’t wait to hear what he says about LA, now that the ‪#‎Dodgers‬ have DFA’ed him.

Unreality TV

September 16, 2015
Tonight was the second GOP debate. Otherwise known as “Dancing with the Questions.”
Joe Biden says that Donald Trump has a “sick” message, and is “appealing to the baser side of human nature, working on this notion of xenophobia in a way that hasn’t occurred in a long time.”
Wonder how many Trump supporters are thinking “What’s xenophobia? Trump’s just against all these damn foreigners.”

Lots of candidate talk about Ronald Reagan. Not much talk about Reagan’s tax hikes, increased budget deficit, and signing an immigration act in 1986 that which granted amnesty to almost 3 million undocumented immigrants. Am sure it’s just coincidence. ‪#‎GOPdebate

All these candidates who want to defund ‪#‎PlannedParenthood‬ and talk about family planning alternatives. Would one of them like to name one such alternative. And their plan to fund welfare for children born from unplanned pregnancies?
All this discussion of “judicial tyranny” with the Supreme Court on the subject of gay marriage. Where were all these clowns when the Supreme Court declared George W. Bush President?
Donald Trump on tonight’s debate: ‘I think I could tone it down a little”: Right, he could, but he didn’t..

Donald Trump during the debate – I was for a flat tax before I was against it. I was for the rich paying more before I was against it. This is so confusing.

Carly Fiorina goes back to the marijuana gateway drug line. Cue ‪#‎DemonSheep‬.  Cue ‪#‎ReeferMadness  ‬ ‪#‎GOPDebate‬

Jeb Bush – ‬ “My brother kept us safe.” Well, except for that little 9/11 thing. ‪#‎GOPDebate‬

Lindsey Graham says it doesn’t make sense to deport millions of undocumented immigrants, but they should learn to speak English. Well sure, but so should millions of people born in the U.S.

I’d take these GOP candidates calling for war with Iran more seriously if they’d call for a draft to get people to fight it, and a way to pay for it.

The NFL has granted permission for New England clubhouse attendants John Jastremski and Jim McNally, who were suspended over Deflategate, to return, and the Patriots will reinstate them.
So yeah, guess those footballs were so in awe of Brady’s brilliance that they just deflated themselves.

More debate.  A real question “If you’re elected President, how would the world look different after you lead office?”  Waiting for the honest answer from someone: “Well, Hell would host an awesome Winter Olympics.” ‪#‎GOPdebate‬

Rutgers football coach Kyle Flood has been suspended three games and fined $50,000 for allegedly emailing a lecturer inquiring about a grade for one of his potentially failing players. What Flood is really being suspended and fined for? A). being too stupid to have one of his staff do the the dirty work, and B) putting it in an email..

A post-debate thought. Talking about the general election Chris Christie said he would prosecute “Mrs. Clinton in those debates.” That is, if Christie is not defending himself in a courtroom over the backroom deals that led to the resignation of the CEO of United Airlines.

#‎Peavy‬ gets his first home run of the year. 9th for ‪#‎SFGiants‬ pitchers in 2015. One behind Pablo Sandoval. ‪#‎byebyebaby‬

#‎ChrisHeston‬ and ‪#‎MattCain‬ do not have home runs for the ‪#‎SFGiants‬ this year yet. Time to get them some ABs.

Amazing story about the Muslim student who was accused of building a bomb when he had only built a clock. Have to wonder these days how many students can even read a clock?

In a few cities, 7-11 is offering delivery service of a “Date Night Pack”, which includes ice cream, candy, Red Bull and condoms. Thinking if your idea of a Date Night is 7-11, you’re not likely to need the pack.

Actor Stephen Rannazzisi, who said he escaped from the World Trade Center on 9-11 and then quit his desk job to become a comedian, now says he made the story up. Stand by for his interview with Brian Williams.

The ‪#‎SFGiants‬ are on a mission to singlehandedly destroy the DH. Now Madison Bumgarner was the first pitcher ever to reach base against Aroldis Chapman. But the Reds’ closer had gotten to an 0-2 count vs. 57 hitters this year. He struck out 41 of them, and none of them walked. Until Madbum.


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