Posted tagged ‘Janice Hough’

Busted and broken.

March 5, 2015

Hunter Pence may have a broken arm after being hit by a pitch from Chicago Cubs prospect Corey Black. So is this the Cubs’ strategy to win the NL this year? Start eliminating the competition?

Harrison Ford has apparently been injured when a small plane he was piloted crashed onto a Southern California golf course. Was Ford trying to adjust his left blinker at the time?

Some very smart high-energy dogs, like Border Collies and Jack Russell terriers, can be great to have around, but they are easily bored. Which means when they have nothing to do, they FIND something to do. Now, how would you like to be Bruce Bochy with a sidelined Hunter Pence hanging out in the SF Giants dugout?

And we thought the Jeter circus was over. Today Brian Cashman said – “As far as I’m concerned, and I’m not the decision-maker on this, that captaincy should be retired with number 2. I wouldn’t give up another captain title to anybody else.” So Jeter isn’t just the most-hyped Yankee ever, he’s the most important Yankee ever? ‪#‎sowhenwillNYmakeJetersbirthdayaholiday‬?

With all this flap over Hillary’s emails, wonder if Joe Biden is begging reporters to ask about HIS emails? Somebody, anybody want to read them? Please?

The woman who was sexting with Anthony Weiner now is claiming that an unnamed Democratic politician from the Midwest sent her texts begging to be “to be tied up and left in a closet.” Ah for the good old days when men just picked up prostitutes in hotel bars.

 

Your daily Florida item?    A Fort Myers man is claiming he fatally shot his neighbor in self-defense. Then he put the body in his pickup and drove to his lawyer’s office. Come on, Texas and Arizona, catch up!

So regarding Daniel Murphy and his “gay lifestyle” comment, what’s a “gay lifestyle?” Know gay working parents and couples who seem to have a lifestyle that doesn’t differ much from my heterosexual friends. Is he implying single gays hook up more often than single heterosexuals. Think the success of Tinder would indicate otherwise…..

Meanwhile, regarding that “heterosexual lifestyle, ”  Chris Soules, the “Bachelor”, is apparently now going on “Dancing With The Stars.” Is it just me, or is it seeming increasingly likely this guy isn’t ever going back to farming in Iowa?

The Pittsburgh ‪#‎Steelers‬ are apparently set to release ‪#‎TroyPolamalu‬. So sad, forget the face, he’s been the hair of the franchise.

A Delta flight today landed at New York’s LaGuardia airport and skidded off the runway into a snow bank. So did they at least give passengers credit for the extra distance traveled in their frequent flier accounts?

LaGuardia announced today their airport was is closed due to a runway “incident.” “Incident?!”. Right. Better I guess than saying “We gotta broken plane that’s stuck in a snowbank. You gotta problem with that?”

 

From T.C.  “A Delta flight skidded off the runway this morning during a steady snowfall at New York’s LaGuardia airport. Passengers evacuated safely and were bussed to a nearby Delta terminal. The ones that paid the $5 Bus Fee, that is.”

Tastes of spring?

March 5, 2015

USC researchers claim they have found a hormone – called MOTS-c – that works in mice as an alternative to exercise. And they say MOTS-c may some day allow people both to lose weight and regulate their blood sugar. Awesome. Can they put it in a pill made of chocolate?

The founders of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream said last month that they are open to someday making a marijuana-infused flavor. Ben Cohen on Huffington Post: “It makes sense to me. Combine your pleasures. … where it’s legal!”

Major funding for this campaign will no doubt be provided by 7-11.

How sweet it is in Northern California to get in your car to run an errand, and the first thing you hear from the radio is Jon Miller – “2 and 0 count, Posey on deck….” ‪#‎springiscoming‬

Peyton Manning will apparently take a $4 million pay cut next season. If he’s smart presume Peyton will demand the Broncos spend the money on the O-line.

A California high school girls’ basketball team was kicked out of the playoffs for wearing pink and white uniforms to raise awareness for breast cancer research. They have now been reinstated. But presumably the office who booted them in the first place has been offered a job with the NFL?

 

Former Sony Pictures co-chair Amy Pascal transitioning to a producer,but her assigned new suite was formerly used by Seth Rogen, and apparently she says she can’t move into it because of the strong stench of marijuana smoke. So Sony is repainting the office. They couldn’t have just moved her and just offered the suite to younger producers? ‪#‎EaudeColorado‬

American Airlines passengers on a flight that arrived in Denver today had to slide down off the plane on emergency chutes, after smoke was reported in the plane. Fortunately no fire was found, and American has generously offered to waive their slide ride fee.

Nearly 1,000 flights have already been cancelled today and tomorrow because of the latest storms in the U.S. So when we finally reach Spring which airline will be the first to institute a “Winter recovery” fee.

“State’s snow levels reach historic lows” Not sure who’s more upset about that SF Chronicle headline. Drought-weary Californians. Or winter-weary Bostonians.

Dr. Ben Carson said today that the proof homosexuality is a choice is that “a lot of people go into prison straight, and when they come out, they’re gay.” Well, looks like the good doctor is making an early play for that all important stupid vote.

 

Ben Carson,  several hours later, upon further reflection: “I do not pretend to know how every individual came to their sexual orientation, I regret that my words to express that concept were hurtful and divisive. For that I apologize unreservedly to all that were offended.” Translation, someone just told me there are gay Republicans, and they vote.

 

Wrecks and more wrecks.

March 4, 2015

Jim Harbaugh apparently stopped to help two women who were injured in a car accident on the interstate in Michigan this afternoon. Kudos to Jim, but makes sense, after dealing with 49ers management Harbaugh probably found a car wreck easier to deal with than a train wreck.

Sweet Briar college has announced that for financial reasons, they are shutting down at the end of the academic year. What a shame. No doubt some SEC school would have offered the college $1 million to play them in football.

Edward Snowden’s lawyer says he that Snowden wants to return to the United States if he’s guaranteed a fair trial. Sounds like someone’s had enough of living in Russia.

During the Aaron Hernandez trial today, a maid testified at his murder trial that she saw him “messing with” the security camera in his basement the day after the killing. You do again have to wonder, as stupid as Hernandez seems to be, how did he stay out of jail for so long?

The SF Chronicle has reported that Jim Harbaugh exhibits have been removed from the 49ers museum at Levi’s Stadium. Guess Jed York wants fans to remember the halcyon days of Mike Nolan and Mike Singletary.

 

Do they have online medical schools now or something? Dr. David Samadi, on Fox & Friends last weekend. “Now we have crack babies coming in because pregnant women are smoking this whole marijuana business.” ‪#‎facepalm‬

(I looked it up, Dr. Samadi is an expert on prostate cancer…. Figures.)

Hillary Clinton apparently used a private email address instead of a government address while she was secretary of state.    Which probably translates to  “same lack of security, different hackers.”

Here’s what I really don’t get on the Hillary Clinton email story. Okay. so she must have sent tens of thousands of emails, at least, in four years. And if it was such a big deal on what account she used, somehow none of her recipients saw fit to make an issue of it at the time?

Maryland Child Protective Services will now keep a file open on two parents after they were found responsible for ‘unsubstantiated’ child neglect. This for letting their 10 and 6 year old children walk together by themselves a mile home from the park. If only they had just let their kids play at home with guns….

Seven players were ejected after a bench clearing fight during last night’s Texas-Baylor men’s basketball game. The schools may review the tape for possible further discipline, and their football programs may review the tape for possible recruiting

 

After Billy Bean visited the Mets clubhouse, Daniel Murphy spoke at length to the NY Daily News about his feelings. “I disagree with the lifestyle. But that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t love a teammate who is gay.” And he added “And I completely understand why someone who believes it is not a choice, that you’re born with it, would take issue with my beliefs, that it is a lifestyle.”

Ought to be very interesting what kind of service Murphy gets in restaurants and from flight attendants this year. And guessing the guy is NEVER going to play 2nd for San Francisco.

(Have no problem with differing beliefs, but what WAS Daniel thinking?. Might be hard for a team right now to sign an openly gay player, but it’s easy NOT to sign a mid-level player who will alienate any significant part of a fan base.)

 

 

New Oakland SS Marcus Semien hit a home run of Madison Bumgarner today in the team’s spring training opener against the SF Giants. And followed that with another home run and an RBI single. If this keeps up,Semein can count on the A’s trading him midseason.

 

 

From Neal, on ISIS threatening Twitter CEO and employees for not allowing their posts:   “They destroy ancient statues and artifacts but they want Twitter..

Tweets and twits?

March 3, 2015

You can’t make this “stuff” up. Now ISIS has threatened Twitter and its employees for shutting down their accounts. So let me get this straight, the infidels ISIS so despises have created something they are outraged at the thought of living without….

 

Detroit has decided not to use the franchise tag on Ndamukong Suh. So much for those potential headlines “Lions put their foot down on Suh.”

Apparently PGA pro Dan Olsen (who?) said last week in a radio interview that Tiger Woods is not on tour because he is serving a month-long suspension for a failed drug test. Woods’ agent and the PGA tour itself strongly denied the claim. Well, yeah, duh. If Tiger were taking PED’s he’d have been playing better.

 

Jameis Winston has filed to trademark “Famous Jameis.” Let’s hope whichever team drafts the young quarterback doesn’t end up wanting to toss their cookies.

 

It’s a start that WalMart is going to start paying a $9 an hour minimum wage. Means that their employees will only have to work about a day and a half to afford ONE entry fee to Disneyland.

William Shatner doubled down on missing Leonard Nimoy’s funeral today “My understanding is mourn the dead but celebrate life. I chose to celebrate life by going to the Red Cross gathering in Palm Beach, raised a lot of money for the Red Cross.”

Okay, except flying East Coast to West coast you gain time, and just GUESSING the man, or Priceline, could have afforded a private jet. ‪#‎Livelongandbs‬

 

The Houston Chronicle reports that after 3-yr-old and 4-yr old boys accidentally fatally shot themselves this weekend, a 6-yr-old is in critical condition after being shot today by his 5-yr-old brother. And local sheriffs are now distributing free gun locks. Uh, shouldn’t guns COME with gun locks?

The Arizona Legislature is trying to get the U.S. Supreme Court to declare their state’s independent commission for drawing congressional boundaries unconstitutional. Their lawyer claims the “ultimate check on partisan gerrymandering is the ability to throw the bums out.” Uh, no, that’s exactly the ability partisan gerrymandering takes away.

 

What a long strange trip it’s been. The cheapest seat on Stubhub for the Grateful Dead’s reunion concert in July is over $1300. And the top price is over $100,000. Of course, to be fair, most Deadheads who regularly saw the band in its heyday probably can’t remember any of the concerts.

Bill Littlejohn on Marshawn Lynch’s latest:  “Marshawn Lynch gave an interview to Turkish TV and said he expected the ball on the last Super Bowl play.He also said, ‘I’m just here so I won’t have to take the Midnight Express’

Fantasyland

March 2, 2015

An internet hoaxer posted a video of a naked man apparently jumping out of Buckingham Palace. Silly hoaxer. It would have been a lot more believable if the video had purported to show an early morning shot of a naked Prince Harry climbing back in.

You know it’s a nice ‪#‎DowntonAbbey‬ finale when you find yourself in a Christmasy mode in March.

Firefighters put out a small blaze near the “It’s a Small World” ride at Disneyland. Unfortunately for many parents, the ride was not damaged.

-

#‎stayclassy‬ A police officer is being sued for allegedly coercing a woman shoplifting suspect to repeatedly have sex with him or else be arrested. Nope, this is New Jersey. But hope this doesn’t give anyone in Florida ideas

 

 

While Jimmy Rollins, 37, signed with the Dodgers, he said today the NY Mets were second on his list. Guess Rollins decided he wasn’t so old that he needed guaranteed Octobers off?

Marshawn Lynch said he “expected the ball” for the Seahawks’ last Super Bowl play. And Pete Carroll is thinking, NOW he speaks, when I’d preferred him to have responded ‪#‎ImjustheresoIdontgetfined‬ .

This was Parent’s Weekend at Stanford University, and it was 70 degrees and sunny in Palo Alto. Biggest problem for students – getting their parents to leave.

 

California Senator Dianne Feinstein today called Israeli PM Benjamin Netanyahu “arrogant”, adding “I think that arrogance does not befit Israel, candidly.” Waiting for the first clown in the car to attack Feinstein for being anti-Jew.

 

Scott Walker on Fox News Sunday, when asked about his statement in 2013 that he could see a path to citizenship for undocumented workers, said he has changed his mind and is no longer for “amnesty.”

You know, I do believe people change their minds. But I think I’d believe these clowns a little more if just once before the primaries some politician changed his or her mind in a way that didn’t align them more with their party’s base.

The Onion has a story about American Airlines phasing out complimentary cabin pressurization. Which of course is absurd. An airline would never do that. Although no doubt American and others are racing to see who can be the first to offer “standard” air, and purified “premium” air for a surcharge.

 

Have to wonder, how many people who proclaimed Je Suis Charlie couldn’t take SNL’s relatively minor parody about a girl joining ISIS?

 

 

Let’s make a deal.

February 28, 2015

Officials say they have seized 15 tons of marijuana at a border crossing near San Diego. Okay, seems like it’s time for California Governor Jerry Brown to discuss a little trade with Colorado for water.

 

AEG, who wants to build an NFL stadium next to Staples, commissioned a study by former Homeland Security Security Tom Ridge that said an Inglewood professional sports stadium would be too close to LAX, and thus a terrorism target. Except Shea Stadium and now Citi Field are right next to LaGuardia. Or are the Mets not considered a pro team.

An LA County Sheriff’s official said that a white dress that “greatly resembles” the missing gown taken from Lupita Nyong’o’s hotel room was found yesterday under a sink in the same hotel. Or maybe the dress was found the same day as the theft, but the finder thought it was blue.

You can’t make this “stuff” up dept: Richard Mack, a former Arizona sheriff, who founded the anti-Federal government “Constitutional Sheriff and Peace Officer Association” and fought Obamacare, has now started a GoFundMe campaign to cover his and his wife’s medical care. Because Mack had a heart attack, his wife is ill, and they are uninsured.

Two volleyball players at Erskine College in South Carolina came out as gay. And the school reacted by banning homosexuality, saying in a statement that members of their “community are expected to follow the teachings of scripture concerning matters of human sexuality.” Okay, then, so like Abraham, David, Solomon etc, how many wives and concubines are men at the college allowed?

A new app will allow people to upload pictures of their pets, and let others rate them as “cute or not.” This is probably not what Al Gore had in mind when he invented the internet.

A police chief has been arrested and fired after he ordered a “two-girl special” in an undercover prostitution sting. Yep, Florida. (Miami Gardens)

 

 

William Shatner says he has to miss Leonard Nimoy’s funeral due to a commitment tonight to attend a Red Cross Charity ball in Florida. What, Shatner couldn’t somehow find a late-night or early morning flight on Priceline?

Worst thing about that American Airlines flight from Dallas to Oklahoma City where passengers were stuck on the plane for 9 hours at DFW Airport. The DRIVE time from Dallas to Oklahoma City is about 3 1/2 hours.

White Sox ace Chris Sale fractured his right foot yesterday, apparently from jumping off of his truck. Was he washing it at the time?

(from my friend Tom D. “I kent believe it.”)

 

Russian President Vladimir Putin has taken “personal control” of the investigation into the murder of his political opponent Boris Nemtsov, who was shot yesterday near the Kremlin. And no doubt he will find an investigator who will work tirelessly to blame the killing on anyone but Mr. Putin.

Dressed?

February 28, 2015

Note to men, it doesn’t matter what color you say the dress is, as long as you don’t say it makes her look fat.

“He’s dead, Jim” End of an era. Leonard Nimoy has passed away at the age of 83. He prospered but seems like he did not live long enough..

 

 

 

 

With all that is going on in the world, this week Americans seem most focused on a dress and runaway llamas?! . Now we know what REALLY killed Leonard Nimoy. ‪#‎beammeupScottytheresnointelligentlifeonthisplanet‬

 

 

Most upset person in the US over ‪#‎theDress‬” has to be Kim Kardashian. Americans are actually ignoring her pictures in favor of a body that is fully clothed? ‪#‎thenerve‬

 

#‎whythereisnosatire‬. Gov. Scott Walker said this week that his experience taking on thousands of protestors in Wisconsin has helped prepare him to take on international terrorists. ‪#‎facepalm‬

Illinois GOP Rep. Aaron Schock has personally repaid $40,000 this month, after he was accused of spending taxpayer money to decorate his congressional office in the style of the TV show “Downton Abbey.” “Downton Abbey?” Really? How shocking! A Republican watches PBS?

Marco Rubio today at CPAC said “Hillary Clinton” is “Yesterday.” So if it’s Clinton-Bush in 2016 can we count on Rubio for a rousing chorus of “Yesterday Once More?”

 

The NBA says that on Monday and throughout the playoffs, the league will now publicly release internal reports on all calls and relevant no-calls in the final minutes of close games. Not that they will change such calls after the fact. Maybe they can start by retroactively apologizing to the 2002 Sacramento Kings.

So there are rumors that the NFL is sitting on a video regarding a 2011 incident where Dez Bryant’s girlfriend was apparently dragged around a Wal-Mart parking lot by an unidentified black man. (She and Bryant have denied the two were in an argument.) But hey, it’s all good. If it’s the NFL I am sure no one’s actually looked at the tape.

 

The House voted down a stopgap funding measure for the Department of Homeland Security today., resulting in this comment “There are terrorist attacks all over world and we’re talking about closing down Homeland Security. This is like living in world of crazy people.” And this is not Nancy Pelosi. It’s GOP Rep. Peter King.

Meanwhile,  though the bill finally passed, So when can we expect ‪#‎RudyGiuliani‬ to start screaming about GOP House members who voted down ‪#‎HomelandSecurity‬ $$$ not loving America.


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