Posted tagged ‘Green Bay jokes’

The lights weren’t out, the party wasn’t over.

January 19, 2015

Some say God wanted the Seahawks to win. But isn’t it as likely that God was rooting for the Packers and just turned to the Colts-Patriots figuring the game was over?

The ending of the NFC championship was bad enough Packers fans are getting sympathy cards from Cubs fans.

Quite a number of Seahawks fans actually left with a few minutes left in the game.   Suppose that’s better than all the Packers who didn’t show up in the fourth quarter.

 

Considering how popular both the  ‪#‎Patriots‬ and ‪#‎Seahawks‬ are wonder how many Americans will fast-forward through ‪#‎SuperBowl‬ to get to commercials

 

Will the ‪#‎Seahawks‬ vote ‪#‎Bostick‬ a ‪#‎SuperBowl‬ playoff share?

 

In “prop bets” though,  who had Russell Wilson getting his first completion of the day with less than four minutes less in the second quarter?  And who had him completing more passes in the first half to the Packers than the Seahawks?

The NFL  warned Marshawn Lynch that if he had worn gold cleats Sunday as he planned, he would have been ejected from the NFC championship game. Good to see the league once again focusing on what’s important.

Not a Seahawks fan, but if the problem with Lynch’s gold cleats was that they might have been a distraction, why weren’t the Oregon Ducks’ uniforms declared illegal most weeks.

Meanwhile, TC asks “Did anyone notice that Jim Nantz and Phil Simms were not wearing “Bose” headsets? That has to be a $50,000 fine at least from the NFL! EACH!!!!!”

 

Indianapolis reporter Bob Kravitz tweeted “Breaking: A league source tells me the NFL is investigating the possibility the Patriots deflated footballs Sunday night. More to come.” He added that “no one is suggesting this is why Colts lost” but if true the story will just add to New England’s lovable reputation.

 

On a brighter note, at least the Colts didn’t break their fans’ hearts in the 4th quarter.

First Jim Tomsula. Now rumors have the 49ers looking at Lane Kiffin as an offensive coordinator. And in from Ann Arbor you can almost hear a new resident giggling.

And one thing about Lane Kiffin, he’ll have the “offensive” part down pat.

 

Tony Verna, 81, the inventor of instant replay for sports on TV, has passed away. At his funeral, wonder how many times they will review his life?

FOX News apologized four times Saturday for recent incorrect information about Muslims in Europe- things like more than half the Muslims in France supporting ISIS, Sharia law superseding local law, there being “no-go” zones etc. Less shocking that people on FOX said these things perhaps, then that they apologized for them.

Gorgeous George

January 12, 2015

Tina Fey at the Golden Globes: “George Clooney married Amal Alamuddin this year. Amal is a human rights lawyer who worked on the Enron case, was an advisor to Kofi Annan regarding Syria and was selected for a three-person UN commission investigating rules of war violations in the Gaza strip. So tonight, her husband is getting a lifetime achievement award.”

Hey, I thought Amal WAS Clooney’s lifetime achievement award.

 

With ‪#‎jesuisCharlie‬ trending, it’s the first time most Americans have learned a French phrase since Lady Marmalade and ‪#‎voulezvouscouchezavecmoi‬.

Aaron Rodgers was calling “New York Bozo” at the line during the Green Bay -Dallas game.  Silly man. Chris Christie is from New Jersey.

 

Cowboys fans are still upset about the refs overturning Dez Bryant’s catch. Understandable. It might have been the most controversial reversed NFL call in the past… week.

 

And who knows, some Dallas fans were perhaps unhappy to discover that paying off referees left then open in future to a higher bidder.

So now that the ‪#‎Cowboys‬ have lost, Chris Christie can stop ignoring New Jersey on weekends for football and get back to ignoring the state for the important business of running for President.

Although if I’m a referee from today’s Green Bay – Dallas game, I maybe allow a little extra time for future bridge crossings.

 

A second Ducks star has been suspended for smoking pot. So who knew the NCAA national championship could come down to Oregon legalizing marijuana before Ohio?

Rex Ryan is going to coach the Buffalo Bills. The NY Daily reports that he preferred the Falcons, but Atlanta was ‘dragging their feet’ on the process. And we all know how Rex feels about feet.

 

The 49ers’ offensive coordinator Greg Roman is apparently leaving to follow Rex Ryan to the Bills. So just how toxic does owner Jed York have to be to make moving to Buffalo an upgrade over staying in San Francisco?

Rutgers just upset #4 Wisconsin in college basketball. Which means Chris Christie should be happy. Except that since he apparently started rooting for the ‪#‎Cowboys‬ when local teams s*cked, Christie probably cheers for Kentucky or Arizona.

All aboard the bus to hell. Who knew it would be more dangerous to attend a Chris Brown concert than a Paris anti-terror rally?

 

FOX News etc criticizing President Obama for only sending U.S. Ambassador to France Jane Hartley to the Unity rally in Paris. Uh, Obama also didn’t forbid any members of Congress from going over to join the rally.

My friend Gib. W. says “Fox was just upset because they’d already worked up a chart on the cost of Obama going.”

 

 

Most of these women on the ‪#‎GoldenGlobes‬ look like they spent a lot of time and effort to have smooth faces that look like they came from the same doll mold. ‪#‎Plasticisntsexy‬

The Blame Game?

February 9, 2011

Michelle Obama has announced that her husband has quit smoking. Wonder how long it will take the GOP to accuse the President of contributing to unemployment in the tobacco industry?

Taco Bell has been fighting back against a lawsuit that says the “seasoned ground beef” in its menu items doesn’t contain enough beef meat. And as a gesture of thanks the chain is offering a free Crunchy Beef Taco to its first 10 million Facebook fans.  Ten million tacos?!  Wow.  That’s almost a ton of meat.

The Tea Party is coming out with a new magazine to express their anti-government platform – the Tea Party Review. But how are they going to deliver it? Surely not by the U.S. Post Office.

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Coach Sean Payton says he is committed to the Saints but he isnownow relocating his family back to their home town of Dallas from New Orleans. This might be the closest Jerry Jones comes to having a Super Bowl winning coach in Dallas.

One sentence to sum up what kind of winter it’s been. “On Monday, Mark Wilson won the frost-delayed Phoenix Open.”

A recent GE study looking at the disconnect between patients and their doctors said 28% of Americans say they sometimes lie or omit facts when talking to their health care provider about their care. And the other 72 % lie to survey takers.

The Los Angeles Lakers have now joined the negotiations to get Carmelo Anthony from the Denver Nuggets. Apparent object – how to take back the title “Most hated team in America” from the Miami Heat.

Former Republican Senate candidate Christine O’Donnell of Delaware has sent out a fundraising letter claiming she was the “White House’s”  top opponent in 2010. In related news, the Cleveland Cavaliers have sent out a letter to their fans with a special offer to buy potential playoff tickets.

So now the story comes out that the NFL knew there was a potential problem with Super Bowl tickets, but kept quiet in hopes of the new seats being ready in time. And why would they have any reason to suspect Cowboys owner Jerry Jones of over-reaching ambition?

And apropos of nothing except regarding that old chestnut “size matters.”  Population of  Green Bay -about 102,000.  Number of people who in one way or another got crammed into Cowboys Stadium Sunday?  About 103,000.

From Marc Ragovin: A recent article said that the vast majority of New York City high school graduates are unprepared to succeed in college. In response, a group of exasperated students said “We ain’t?”


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