Posted tagged ‘cold weather jokes’

Cold days…

January 25, 2013

Icy cold temperatures are still blanketing the Northeast. But back in Southern California the only serious frost remaining is between Kobe Bryant and Dwight Howard.

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It’s an axiom in business that no one is irreplaceable. And somewhere Steve Jobs is thinking “Wrong again, suckers.”

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In a radio interview today about the Super Bowl, Jackie Harbaugh said. “I know one is going to win and one is going to lose but I really would like it to end in a tie. Can the NFL do that?” Paging Bud Selig!

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Sammy Sosa thinks he belongs in the Baseball Hall of Fame. Even Manti T’eo thinks “that’s delusional.”

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Hardest thing to believe about this Manti T’eo story? Maybe that in a era of “friends with benefits,” a young man who is a good looking star athlete would be willing to have a girlfriend without benefits.

 

The San Jose Sharks are 3-0. Which means that despite the strike the team is still ready to have a great season and then disappoint their fans in the playoffs.

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Asked a question about John Boehner’s contention that Obama is trying to annihilate the GOP, White House spokesman Jay Carney said that is not the President’s goal, and that he “would object” if the GOP was destroyed. What he didn’t add was “anyway, the Republicans seem to be doing a good job of that on their own.”

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John Mackey, CEO of Whole Foods, told Mother Jones, “Climate change is perfectly natural and not necessarily bad.” Wonder the reaction if you quoted that line at Whole Foods to the cashier next time you forget to bring your own bag.

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American Idol has done the impossible – make most Americans miss Paula Adbul.

 

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Two men are suing Lance Armstrong and his book publishers for fraud and false advertising because they say his two memoirs are full of lies. Wonder how long it will take bookstores to move all remaining copies to the “Fantasy” section.

or, (with an assist from my friend James Brady), considering the biotech involved, maybe the books should be in the “Science Fiction” section…

 

Did she or didn’t she? Now some say Beyonce was not lip-synching at President Obama’s inaugural, but just singing along to a pre-recorded track. How long until the GOP calls for a congressional investigation?

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In New Mexico, state Rep. Cathrynn Brown introduced a bill where a woman who aborted a pregnancy resulting from rape would be charged with a felony for “tampering with evidence.” Wow. Proving that today’s GOP doesn’t even need men to be anti-woman.


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