Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ category

Gone guy?

July 26, 2015

Donald Trump says his immigration strategy will be to deport “the bad dudes.” So does the Donald have his own bags packed yet?

President Obama at a dinner in Kenya “II suspect that some of my critics back home are suspecting that I’m back here to look for my birth certificate.”

Of course not. they think Barack had the birth certificate burned a long time ago.

Zack Greinke’s scoreless streak is over at 45 2/3 innings. Jacob deGrom got the RBI on a fielder’s choice. Of course, it had to be a pitcher. And Madison Bumgarner is thinking “I would have taken Greinke deep.”

A woman who won a $188 million lottery jackpot this year in North Carolina was busted this week for marijuana. You’d think with that much money she could afford to move to Colorado.

Rick Perry thinks “appropriately trained” Americans should be able to bring guns inside movie theaters and churches to defend themselves. I’m sure that’s comforting to the family of the man who was killed last year in a Florida theater by the retired policeman who was upset by his texting.

The NFL is going to start more serious oversight of football inflation this year, with random halftime and postgame rechecks. Really? They think after actually being caught cheating that the Patriots would ever dare skirt the rules again… Oops, never mind.

How quickly things change. Was it only a couple months ago that Ted Cruz was the craziest GOP candidate for President?

Sad end to the Bobbi Kristina story today. Although the more you hear about her short life the harder it is to imagine the story ever having a happy ending.

How quickly things change. Was it only a couple months ago that Ted Cruz was the craziest GOP candidate for President?

Mike Huckabee, criticizing Obama’s foreign policy “It is so naive that he would trust the Iranians. By doing so, he will take the Israelis and march them to the door of the oven.” So clearly the race is on to out-Trump Trump.

From BIll Littlejohn,  “The Dodgers'; starting pitching beyond Kershaw and Greinke is very suspect. So it’s not ‘Spahn and Sain and pray for rain,’ it’s ‘Clay and Zack, then have a heart attack.

Old and new school?

July 25, 2015

We can’t agree about much in this country. But after Saturday’s 2-1 SF Giants win where Madison Bumgarner hit a home run…. maybe we can at least talk about the DH?-

Eli Manning has now replaced Rob Lowe in the DirecTV ad campaign. And NY Giants fans are thinking “Wait a minute, haven’t we already seen more than we wanted of “Good  Eli Manning/Bad Eli Manning?”

The LA Dodgers have apparently told Yasiel Puig that he will not be traded. Maybe because at this point no other team wants the headaches?

No serious injuries fortunately at a major pool bar fire Saturday night in Las Vegas at the Cosmopolitan Hotel.  Stand by for ads touting “the hottest bar on the strip..”

Airline math is a strange thing. Qantas is advertising a big Business Class sale for travel to Australia that goes only until July 28, 2015, for travel Nov 1, 2015 to Jan 7, 2016. In the fine print – “14-advance purchase required.” Ya think?

Front page of NY Times has a story about Hillary Clinton having some classified data on her personal email server, and how they should “never been stored outside of secure government computer systems.” And in the next column a story about serious fears from the data hacked in the major breach at the government Office of Personnel Management.

And we don’t think professional athletes have problems. Josh Smith, who just signed with the Clippers for the veterans’ minimum, talking about his finances: “At the end of the day, you know, I do have a family. So it is going to be a little harder on me this year. But I’m going to push through it, you know.”
Smith will make $6.9 million this year. ‪#‎myheartbleeds‬

Just thinking, if the Lafayette killer had tried to go to the Humane Society to adopt a kitten he probably would have been turned down for being too unstable. But he had no problem buying a gun.

Deep doo doo?

July 24, 2015

In Idaho, a cyclist stopped to defecate in a ravine and decided it would be a good idea to light his toilet paper on fire afterwards rather than littering with it. And he accidentally started a 73 acre wildfire. Talk about a dumb shit.

SF Giants have had a good week. As long time fans are thinking – hey, if the pitching can just show up and be mediocre the hitters will carry them into the post season….. WTF? Who is this team?

Mets pitcher Jonathon Niese pitched 3 innings tonight against the Dodgers, gave up six runs, then watched his son born on  Face Time before flying home to Ohio.  NY lost 7-2.  Nice effort, but the way the Mets are hitting, Niese would have had to pitch a shutout just to get them into extra innings.

The Obama Administration has apparently opened an investigation into whether American, JetBlue, Delta and Southwest engaged in price-gouging on flights in the Northeast after the major Amtrak crash this spring in Philadelphia.

“I can’t believe airlines would do anything that nasty” said nobody who’s flown in the last decade.

At this point beginning to feel like Trump is competing less with other Presidential candidates than he is competing with the Kardashians.

Dennis Rodman just endorsed Donald Trump for President. No joke. Hmm… Maybe Rodman is from the same planet as that furry thing that lives on Trump’s head?

Tampa Bay CB C.J. Wilson, who lost two fingers in a July 4th fireworks accident, is temporarily at least retiring, and said through an agent that even though C.J.s’ “career has been put in jeopardy as a result of the accident, he’s taking steps to ensure his long-term health is a priority.” Uh, starting with not playing with fireworks?

The New Orleans Saints are releasing LB Junior Galette, 27, the team’s top pass rusher, over character issues including two possible domestic violence incidents.  Over-under on how long before some team decides that the “young man deserves a second chance.”i

WWE has cut ties with Hulk Hogan. Ostensibly over his being a racist, but probably as much for being stupid enough to make those comments on tape.

Could be worse?

July 23, 2015

Ohio Governor John Kasich (who?) has joined the 2016 Presidential race. No word yet on his slogan.  Maybe
You don’t know me but I’m not bat shit crazy.”

Former Texas Gov. Rick Perry says he’s glad Trump is “finally” traveling to the U.S. Mexico border and “I hope he will explain to the Hispanic Americans he meets why he thinks they are rapists and murderers.”
Gawd, just how out there do you have to be to make Rick Perry sound reasonable?

Donald Trump today visited the U.S. Mexico border in Laredo, Texas “despite the great danger.” Five words: God I miss Molly Ivins.

At Yellowstone National Park, a woman escaped with minor injuries when she turned her back to a bison to take a picture, and the animal flipped her into the air. Another Darwin “missed it by THAT much.” ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

Donald Trump is indicating now that he might launch a third-party White House run if the RNC doesn’t treat him well. If true this would prove one of two things: 1. Trump’s ego REALLY knows no bounds. 2. Trump is a closet Democrat.

Anthony Weiner has a new job with a PR firm which specializes in “crisis management.” Well, if anyone has experience in crisis management….

Navy and Notre Dame have announced they will play a college football game at San Diego’s Qualcomm stadium. Stand by for Fighting Irish alums to declare it the biggest game ever played in San Diego.

The US was “shocked” by Jamaica in the Gold Cup. Response from most Americans “What’s the Gold Cup?”

Tom Brady’s merchandise sales are apparently the highest in the NFL. Meaning that prices for such gear will be one thing about the New England QB that surely will be well-inflated.

The Oakland Athletics have started their trades earlier this year, sending pitcher Scott Kazmir to the Houston Astros. Thinking the A’s really need to come up with a bobblehead with an erasable face.

As an old Michigan fan it pains me to say anything nice about an Ohio State player. But QB Cardale Jones apparently was tweeting recently on social issues. And was called out on it for not focusing on football

So he tweeted “Sorry Mr master, I aints allow to tweet nothing but foolsball stuff I donts want you think I more than a foots ball playa sir”  Well played, Mr. Jones,  well played.

And in the closing rant.  So tonight it’s Lafayette. I’m sorry, doesn’t matter what your race, religion or ethnicity is, if you decide to shoot and kill multiple people for no real reason you are a terrorist. And maybe gun worship should be blamed as much as any religion.

Cross at the border?

July 22, 2015

Donald Trump is visiting Laredo to tour the Texas-Mexico border. Though no doubt he won’t cross it. – because it would be embarrassing if the Mexican government deported him as being undesirable.


A Boston writer today wrote that the Red Sox needed to “cleanse themselves” of Sandoval and Ramirez.  Am sure SF Giants fans really feel sorry for Boston. Like you feel sorry when the ex who left you for someone else and slams you on the way has their next relationship fall apart….


NBA commissioner Adam Silver says “No doubt” that some day he can see a woman as NBA head coach. Although have to wonder, would a woman be dumb enough to take on say, the Knicks?

Silver also says that the league may change rules to allow only the top 8 teams in each conference to make the playoffs. In other words, postseason teams in the East can still suck.

Detroit manager Brad Ausmus says he is not giving up on the season as the Tigers are only 4 games out of the Wild Card. With a 46-47 record. Hmm, where does he think he is, the NBA?

Shaquille O’Neal said the all-time Lakers team would beat the all-time Bulls team by 50. And the all-time Spurs team would probably jell togther better and kick both teams’ butts.

So some rumors about Blake Shelton and Miranda Lambert’s divorce say he cheated, some say she cheated. We can settle this real quickly if one of them turns out to have an Ashley Madison account.

A source told People Magazine that the Duggars are “heartbroken” over the cancellation of their TLC Show, and that they want to return to TV. Alas, it’s been several years since they cancelled ‘To Catch a Predator.”
President Obama Tuesday night on the Daily Show said he was issuing an executive order saying that Jon Stewart cannot leave the show. Guess Obama thinks he hasn’t done enough to infuriate the 2016 GOP presidential candidates?
So Obama waited until Tuesday to lower flags to half staff for the Marines shot and killed in Tennessee. I would feel a lot less cynical about those criticizing the President if they weren’t also mostly the same people who want to send MANY more young men and women overseas to risk being shot and killed in foreign wars..

Ted Cruz just convened a Senate hearing to investigate “abuses” by the Supreme court.. Saying recent decisions including on same-sex marriage are the “very definition of tyranny.”

The dictionary definition of “tyranny” includes words like unjust, oppressive and especially “cruel.” So who exactly suffers personally when gays get marriage?

DeAndre Jordan, on his convoluted return to the Clippers – “When free agency started, this whole fiasco was not my intent.” Sounds like DeAndre’s intentions were as on target as his free throw shooting.
Apparently a fire broke out today on the 4,000 passenger Freedom of the Seas cruise ship in Jamaica today, but it was quickly put out by the ship’s fire suppression system. Royal Caribbean says no passengers were injured, but one crew member suffered a first degree burn. Stand by for around the clock updates from CNN.

Tax dollars at work.

July 22, 2015

In April, a federal appeals court overturned Barry Bonds’ obstruction of justice conviction. Today, ending an almost 10 year battle, the U.S. Department of Justice announced they will not ask for a review with the U.S. Supreme Court and are ending the case.

What? Reluctance to spend more taxpayer dollars on this vital issue? ‪#‎IblameObama‬

As we await the potential release of client names from Ashley Madison is it wrong to wonder how many of these spouses met on

Mississippi State suspended CB Justin Cox for the last three games in 2014 after he was arrested for alleged aggravated domestic violence and burglary. The charges were dropped, and Cox signed with the KC Chiefs.

Yesterday he was arrested again on charges of burglary of a residence, aggravated domestic assault and trespassing. ‪#‎Cantfixstupid‬

Now that Becky Hammon has coached the Spurs to an Summer League Championship, wonder if some NBA team might make an offer to a proven winner like Tara Vanderveer. ‪#‎GoStanford‬

But hey, it was summer league…. what does that show?   Well, in 2013 Jason Kidd had his first head coaching gig in Las Vegas and his Nets made the playoffs.  Then last year another guy made his coaching debut … name of Steve Kerr.   Turned out to be ok.

Today at a campaign event Donald Trump attacked Lindsey Graham and then gave out the Graham’s personal cell phone number. Not sure if Trump really wants to be President, but he’s doing well in his question to become the Republican party’s most hated person not named Clinton.

Roger Goodell says there is no timeline on Tom Brady’s suspension appeal, and that they are “being very thorough.” Does the NFL commission have one of Bud Selig’s “Blue Ribbon” committees working on it?


The SF Giants’ Tim Lincecum has been diagnosed with a degenerative hip condition. No doubt after he got the diagnosis Timmy had one question – “Medical marijuana?”


For anyone watching the SF Giants game,  Padres pitcher Dale Thayer threw that gum better than he threw that bases-loaded pitch to Hector Sanchez.

Giants catcher Hector Sanchez, just recalled from AAA, hit a grand slam for the SFGiants.  Just guessing  that that he was really really tired of playing in Sacramento. ‪#‎SFGiants‬

A Florida gun shop owner has declared his store a “Muslim-free zone” after the latest mass murders in Tennessee, to ensure “the safety of his fellow patriots” And he announced the decision in front of a Confederate flag. So I guess he would have had no problem selling a gun to the Charleston killer?

Would love to see what would happen if a very large African American man with a lot of tattoos walked into his store looking to buy guns. Especially if one of those tattoos was of a bible verse.


Girls, girls, girls…..

July 21, 2015

The San Antonio Spurs, coached by Becky Hammon, just won the NBA Summer League. So, apparently real men don’t have a problem with sexual orientation in the locker room. ‪#‎yougogirl‬

Ashley Madison, the “dating” site for married people, has apparently been hacked and the hackers are threatening to post information on millions of users on line. Who knows, the U.S. political scene could be about to get a lot crazier.

With the Ashley Madison hacking story making headlines, I see a new business model for some enterprising person – A company that will create a credible online to make it seem as if your identity was stolen. “Honest, honey, I have no idea how they got my name and credit card, clearly our personal information has been compromised.”

Anyone who misses watching baseball games at Candlestick Park must have loved watching the final round of the ‪#‎BritishOpen‬.


Curt Schilling tweeted outrage that President Barack Obama failed to issue a proclamation to lower flags around government buildings to half-staff for the Chattanooga victims despite doing so for pop singer Whitney Houston.

Except that Obama didn’t do that. The only government official who ordered flags lowered for the pop star was NJ Gov. Chris Christie.

A gay British man who voluntarily donates sperm says he has fathered 10 children with nine different women in just the last year. So the guy is either really altruistic, or he has delusions of being an NBA player.

The Denver Nuggets have traded Ty Lawson to the Houston Rockets. Hoping it works out, but is it really a great idea to send a guy with 2 DUI’s in a year to a place with Texas’s very relaxed gun laws?

A profile of Karen Hinton, who is New York Mayor DeBlasio’s press secretary, brings up a story from a 1999 book of how in 1984, when she was 24, then Arkansas governor Bill Clinton gave her a napkin with his room number on it. Shocking. Wouldn’t it be more of a story if Clinton in those days was talking to a pretty young blond woman and didn’t give her his room number?

ACC commissioner John Swofford says the conference is “not trying to be Big Brother” in dealing with off-field issues like those at Florida State.

“Our approach $o far, and I don’t really $ee this changing, is that we have a lot of confidence in our in$titution$ to handle those $ituation$ when they occur.”

In Iowa, a former lottery security official was found guilty  of rigging a game so he could win a $14 million jackpot, and then trying to get someone to cash the prize for him. Hmm, anyone but me worried less about him than about the ones who aren’t stupid enough to get caught?

Palo Alto, California, has been sweltering with temperatures in the mid 80s and 61% humidity. Thereby bringing ZERO sympathy from anyone in the Midwest, South and East.

Blake Shelton and Miranda Lambert, probably THE reigning royal couple of country music, are getting divorced. No word who gets custody of the material for song lyrics.

Between Blake and Miranda though, Taylor Swift might have some competition for “Best breakup song of the year.”


Just in 2014, the NFL gave each teams each $226.4 million as part of national revenue sharing. But all the the league could afford was a $765 million settlement over concussion-related brain injuries for all its 18,000 retired players. I wish this were a joke.


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