Archive for February 2012

Knicks are Roll-Lin

February 9, 2012

Sign held by an Asian man at Verizon Center where the Jeremy Lin led Knicks beat the Washington Wizards – “Who says we can’t drive?”

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Unclear on the concept: Jeremy Lin’s former Palo Alto High coach Peter Diepenbrock “In the last 24 hours, I’ve taken calls from more than 12 different sportswriters in New York alone, I didn’t even know New York had that many sportswriters.” Uh, coach, New York has expotentially more sportswriters than 12 just covering the Yankees.

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Madonna is going to be performing at HP Pavilion, aka the “Shark Tank.” Unlike the San Jose Sharks, however, Madonna has actually made it to a championship game.

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Mitt Romney said today he’s going to be more aggressive in campaigning against Rick Santorum. Translation, “those Super PACS that I know absolutely nothing about and don’t communicate with are going to get a lot more nasty.”

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Enlightened male award of the day to Brandon Jacobs of the Super Bowl Champion NY Giants, for his comments about Giselle Bundchen. “She just needs to continue to be cute and shut up.” As if men listen to anything super models say anyway.

(Update, tonight Jacobs apologized for his words. Which means he probably heard from a higher authority -his wife.)

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Okay, now that Super Bowl betting is over, who’d have wagered that there would be a political controversy over a Clint Eastwood ad? And that Clint would be accused of trying to support a Democratic president?

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But really, Clint Eastwood makes an ad that can be seen as pro-Obama? Right. Next you’ll be telling me that Bill O’Reilly is supporting Ellen Degeneres.

Actually if Eastwood gets mad enough at all these Republican attacks, maybe he WILL make an ad supporting Obama.

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The Minnesota Twins are auctioning off a baseball signed before a game last July by Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries. No guesses as to the estimated price but expect buyer’s remorse 72 days later.

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Sean Hannity said that if President Obama had his way, Bin Laden would still be alive. and he thinks “that can be proved as well on tape.” Assume that tape is in the same place as Obama’s Kenyan birth certificate?

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Apparently there are plans afoot to televise Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries’s divorce proceedings. Well, those proceedings could last longer than the marriage.

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Alan Silverleib of CNN wrote a post titled “Conservatives still resist Romney.” Which basically says they doubt his authenticity. As a moderate liberal, can I add “‘Who says there’s no bipartisan agreement in this country?”

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Memphis has announced they will become the newest Big East member. Well, they are east of new members San Diego State, Boise State, Houston and SMU. (Although the city IS west of, for example, Chicago.)

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U Conn’s mens basketball, facing sanctions for poor academic performance, is suggesting that the Huskies reduce the # of games they play next year if the NCAA will waive their punishment of being banned from 2013’s March Madness tournament. Can’t imagine how the school gets the reputation of thinking the rules don’t apply to them.

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With Proposition 8 being at least temporarily overturned in California, one argument that comes up during the gay marriage debate is that legalizing it will lead to people marrying their pets. Which isn’t going to happen. On the other hand, doesn’t mean that some pets aren’t better in relationships than some humans.

Tax dollars working hard for the money?

February 8, 2012

The House just overwhelmingly passed a bill banning welfare recipients from spending federal aid in strip clubs. No problem there. It would probably be unconstitutional, but shame they can’t also pass a bill banning those in Congress from using their taxpayer funded stipends in strip clubs.

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Can’t wait to see what Tom Brady says about the other women if Giselle Bundchen ever plays in the Lingerie Bowl.

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Jeremy Lin, the New York Knicks’ unlikely new star, is a devout Christian. Hmm, does this mean God was looking for something to do during Tebow’s offseason?

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On American Idol tomorrow, one of the singers who made it to Hollywood is Brittany Kerr, a cheerleader/dancer for Charlotte Bobcats. If she makes it to the finals we may see a new phenomenon, men asking their wives and girlfriends when Idol is on.

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Newly minted Catholic Newt Gingrich is condemning the Obama administration’s decision to require religious hospitals and schools to offer birth control as part of their healthcare plans. Longtime Newt watchers just yawn and wonder what his next wife’s religion will say on the subject.

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A pilot with Lion Air, Indonesia’s largest domestic airline, reportedly tested positive for crystal meth within hours before his scheduled flight. This was the second crystal meth arrest for the airline this year. So maybe passengers haven’t been imagining that their planes take off, fly, and land REALLY REALLY fast.

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Rick Santorum has won tonight in Minnesota, Missouri and Colorado. This is great news, for President Obama.

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Rocket scientist of the day award? To the Denver Bronco’s Knowshon Moreno was arrested and charged with DUI, for driving 70mph in a construction zone with a license plate reading “SAUCED.”

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Santorum wins Colorado! Reaction from moderate conservatives to the state – “Are you Rocky Mountain High?”

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Today in Boston, someone dumped hundreds of Butterfinger candy bars in Boston’s Copley Square on Tuesday with a note: “Thank you Wes Welker.” Haven’t heard anyone pulling stunts joking about Brady throwing that ball to midfield from the end zone. But without that safety a field goal at the end wins the game.

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Happy to see California Prop 8 declared unconstitutional. But if we really want to get more conservatives over to the side of gay marriage, need a campaign that says right now gay couples who are domestic partners pay lower tax rates than married couples.

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Ricky Williams is retiring from the NFL. It could be high time.

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Prosecutors are asking that Jerry Sandusky stay indoors as part of his house arrest. Apparently parents have complained that he can be seen outside and watching children in a schoolyard from the back porch of his home. I’m wondering why they granted this scumbag bail at all.

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Karen Handel, the alleged driving force behind Komen’s decision to cut off funding for Planned Parenthood, resigned today. But in a statement said this was a board supported position and a discussion that started before she arrived. In other words, the company wanted me to steer towards those rocks.

No “I” in Team. But there is an “I” in Giselle.

February 7, 2012

Chrysler’s “Halftime in America” Super Bowl ad is being talked about as a potential boost for President Obama. Republicans are just trying to figure out how to discredit that liberal icon Clint Eastwood.

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“Extra” TV host Maria Menounos, a New England fan, paid off on a bet by wearing a New York Giants bikini in Times Square because the Giants beat the Patriots in the Super Bowl. I think I can speak for all Americans in saying I’m glad Bill Bilicheck didn’t make that same bet.

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Why super models don’t play on teams: Tom Brady’s wife overheard screaming at hecklers after the Super Bowl – “My husband cannot [expletive] throw the ball and catch the ball at the same time. I can’t believe they dropped the ball so many times.”

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Wonder if Giselle Bundchen blamed Kate Winslet for the bad acting reviews in ‘Titanic.”

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Just my opinion, but guessing when Tom Brady and Giselle Bundchen’s son starts playing Pop Warner or Little League, Giselle won’t be chosen as team mom.

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This just in. Tom Brady criticizes some Giselle’s make-up artist for not making her look better.

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All this commotion over M.I.A’s middle finger gesture. Right, as opposed to wholesome regular prime-time television like Family Guy and the Bachelor.

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Anyone else see the Super Bowl trailer for “The Dictator,” and think that Sasha Baron Cohen owes the Giants’ Brian Wilson royalties?

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A Georgia man sustained non life-threatening injuries after he accidentally shot himself in the leg at a Savannah gun show. (With a pistol he had just bought the day before) Wonder if he was wearing a Plaxico Burress jersey.

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The Knicks won tonight with Harvard grad Jeremy Lin, Stanford grad Landry Fields, and Marquette grad Steve Novak. They may not make the playoffs but New York should be unbeatable at “Words with Friends.”

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Mitt Romney today said that he agreed with the Susan G. Komen’s decision to cut Planned Parenthood funding. That probable gender gap in November just turned into the Grand Canyon.

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Hard to believe, but Tim Lincecum said he lost 22 pounds over the winter. SF Giants fans are hoping Pablo Sandoval didn’t find them.

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Mimi Alford, 69, has written a book about her previously unknown relationship with JFK. Just wondering how much the world would be different if we had Twitter and camera phones in the 60s. Heck, even during Clinton’s presidency.

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Rick Santorum told a gay man that he doesn’t deserve the ‘privilege’ of marriage because same sex relationships don’t “benefit society.”

Uh, one of my more generally conservative friends, a wine merchant, would beg to differ. As he says, “Gay couples buy the most expensive champagne.”

All for that matter, no birth control or abortion issues.

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Hard to believe sometimes that an ob/gyn like Ron Paul can be so clueless about women. Especially when he comes up with terms like “Honest Rape.” Talk about a useless oxymoron.

Super question.

February 6, 2012

Super Bowl XLVI is history. So what time this week does the pre-game show for Super Bowl XLVII start?

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Okay, so this year’s Super Bowl commercials may not have been that memorable. On the brighter side for viewers, especially in Florida and South Carolina, none of them were made by political super PACS.

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New England WR Wes Welker dropped a pass late in the fourth quarter that resulted in New York getting the ball back with time to drive for the winning touchdown. NBC commentator Cris Collinsworth commented that Welker makes that catch “100 times out of 100.” Uh, make that 99.

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Not a NY Giants or NE Patriots fan, but at least they didn’t get to the championship with a payroll two to four times that of most of the rest of the league. (Yes, Yankees and Red Sox fans, I’m talking to you.)

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Who says football players don’t need math? For New England being able to count to 12 would have been helpful.

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A GOP friend posted that President Obama called the NY Giants and told them to share the trophy with other 31 teams. Right, and Mitt Romney called the Patriots and told them how to deduct the loss as a write-off.

(My friend Jeff Klein says “Newt Gingrich told both teams he could build them a training facility on the moon.”

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Open note to the younger generation: Madonna was the first Lady Gaga.

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Congratulations to those who bet the first score in the Super Bowl would be a safety. Both of them.

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Today’s Giants-Patriots Super Bowl game is a Jets fan’s worst nightmare. Well, except for the sight of Joe Namath weaving towards a pretty sideline reporter.

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Confused. Madonna sang “Like a Prayer.”. But where was Tim Tebow.

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NFL Commissioner Roger Goddell is now saying that eliminating the Pro Bowl is a possibility. “That would be terrible,” said absolutely nobody.

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Only 366 days until Super Bowl 47, Feb 3, 2013 in New Orleans. How much do we think Drew Brees and company will be motivated to make it a home game?

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There’s an explanation for the latest controversy over Peyton Manning. Apparently he HAS been cleared to play professional football. But based on the 2011 season, that leaves out playing for the Colts.

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Seattle officials are working on plans to build a new arena ,and according to media reports are looking into acquiring the Sacramento Kings. Some are even more ambitious, and hope they can land an actual professional team.

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If you’re reading this….

February 5, 2012

You must have all your Super Bowl shopping done.

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Based on the crowds in Safeway, today is clearly the junk food shopping equivalent of the day before Thanksgiving.

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Fidel Castro has released a 1,000 page memoir, saying “I have to take advantage now, because memories fade. I am willing to do everything possible to share everything I remember well.” In related news, John McCain has released a memoir pamphlet.

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Police used a stun gun on a North Carolina woman who cut the line at a McDonald’s drive-thru and refused to move. A stun gun, really? Isn’t that a bit of overkill. Now, if she had blocked a morning line at Starbucks…..

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How the .1 percenters stay that way. Meg Whitman, when she took over as CEO of Hewlett Packard, took a $1 salary. But she got stock options that brought her compensation to $16.5 million. (No doubt much of that will be considered capital gains at a 15% tax rate)

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Scary thought if it hasn’t happened already. How long until kids grow up thinking Roman numerals are just another NFL creation for Super Bowl week?

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On Saturday afternoon, the NY Giants “accidentally” posted on their website that the team was Super Bowl champions. What hubris. Wonder if the errant employee involved used to work for the Yankees?

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As if we needed more proof that the 1% is not actually suffering any recession symptoms, USA Today reports that even though the SF 49ers haven’t broken ground in Santa Clara yet, the team reports having already sold $138 million in luxury suites.

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If President Obama dropped in to listen to Mitt Romney’s victory speech in Nevada, he would at least double the black turnout.

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According to CNN, in the veterinarians classified 53% of adult dogs in the U.S. and 55% of cats as overweight or obese. Well that’s still probably a lower percentage than their owners.

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Poor Mitt Romney, he’s starting to remind folks of C. Montgomery Burns, without Smithers.

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Newt Gingrich is fighting allegations that he is being petty and childish. So he refers to Romney’s comment about not caring about poor people as a “boo-boo?”

(My friend Dave Ribeiro says Newt’s favorite drink is “scotch and wa-wa.”)

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Congrats to the 49ers Jim Harbaugh who was voted NFL Coach of the Year, with 45 votes out of 50 votes. Three voters went to the Packers’ Mike McCarthy and two went to Denver’s John Fox. McCarthy presumably got votes for not messing up the defending champions. But did those two vote for Fox because God wasn’t on the ballot?

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You cannot make this “stuff” up dept: Indiana’s Secretary of State, the state’s top election official, has been convicted of six felony charges for lying about his address on voter registration forms. (False registration, voting in another precinct, submitting a false ballot, theft and two counts of perjury.)

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Serious PR disaster for the Komen Foundation this week with their temporary decision to stop funding Planned Parenthood. Did you really think you could do something that stupid and no one would notice? – asked Anthony Weiner.

America’s game

February 4, 2012

Your tax dollars at work: 35% of people who attend the Super Bowl write it off as a corporate expense.

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Wonder which team Mitt Romney has picked for his $10,000 bet on the Super Bowl?

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Newt Gingrich’s latest rant Friday was against the New York City “elites.” Well, at least that leaves out the Mets.

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The latest music rumor – Adam Lambert is joining Queen. Old time rock and roll fans may ask “Who’s Adam Lambert.” Young music fans may ask “Who’s Queen?”

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Indianapolis Colts owner Jim Irsay said in a statement today “Peyton Manning, Jim Irsay and the entire Colts family remain close and unified.” Sounds like Kris Humphries and Kim Kardashian on the 60th or so day of their marriage.

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Great jobs report today. You know what that means. Time for the GOP to start talking about Obama’s birth certificate again.

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Mitt Romney called today’s drop in unemployment “good news” , but said that “it has taken a lot longer than it should have, in part because of the policies of this administration.” Of course, if unemployment rises in February, it will be completely BECAUSE of President Obama….

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Rumor has it Kim Kardashian and Mark Sanchez are dating. Is there some way we can make sure they won’t breed?

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While visiting India, Arnold Schwarzenegger told a TV channel he would consider acting in Bollywood if offered “an interesting script with a good director.” Why? Lack of those things never stopped him making movies here.

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From Jim Barach: “A woman was arrested after reportedly trying to extort Yankees GM Brian Cashman. Now Cashman knows how fans feel when they go to buy a hot dog and beer at a Yankees game.”

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A United Airlines flight on Thursday from Chicago to Portland stuck a bird during takeoff and turned around and landed without reported injuries. Well, except for the bird.

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Several other Big Ten coaches are upset after Urban Meyer allegedly “poached” committed recruits from other conference schools. Meyer denies any violations. And Urban should be an expert on wrongdoing since 31 of his players were arrested during his six years at Florida.

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The Koch brothers, along with other conservative millionaires and billionaires apparently want to defeat President Obama so badly they are pledging $100 million. $100 million! Or as Mitt Romney calls it “pocket change.”

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NFL players have been complaining about the injury risks from the 8 Thurs. night games with the shortened recovery period after Sunday. Today Roger Goddell announced they will have 13 Thursday games in 2012, “giving all of the league’s teams a chance to appear in prime time on some outlet.” Can’t imagine how people get the idea the NFL cares more about profits than players.

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Not a Romney fan but have to love Newt Gingrich attacking today Mitt for his verbal gaffes. At least as far as we know Romney didn’t make a mistake with that “forsaking all others” stuff.

You go girl!

February 3, 2012

Even at 82, she’s still got it. Sandra Day O’Connor at the elite Alfalfa Club dinner Saturday in D.C. said of the top two GOP presidential candidates, “one is a practicing polygamist, and he’s not even the Mormon.”

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The GOP primary candidates have moved their circus to Nevada in advance of the caucuses Saturday. If “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas,” can we ask the state to keep all of them?

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13 passengers were injured, one seriously (fractured hip), when their open air bus collided with a parked vehicle on a Royal Caribbean shore excursion. The cruise line said they were on the “”Best of St. Thomas and Shopping” trip. I can see it now – “Honey, of course I think we should go shopping, I’m just concerned about your safety.”

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Another in the “You Might Need a Life” dept – For $25, fans were able to purchase headsets to sit in the stadium stands on Tuesday and listen to Super Bowl media day interviews. Even scarier, apparently at the last minute some of the tickets were being scalped.

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After previously criticizing Mitt Romney regularly, Donald Trump endorsed Mitt for President. When asked why, presumably Trump’s response was “He had me at ‘I like firing people.'”

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Another reason Trump might have endorsed Romney. Maybe in the Donald’s mind this keeps alive his dream of being the first President with at least three wives.

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Apparently prostitutes at the Moonlite Bunny Ranch in Nevada are donating their tips to Ron Paul. What a great country. And unlike some of the leveraged buyout types donating to Romney, these women actually provide value when they screw their fellow Americans.

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There are surprising rumors that Michele Bachmann might endorse Mitt Romney. While Bachmann has denied the rumors, a Boston Globe reporter suggested that her $1 million-plus campaign debt could be a factor in her deliberations. $1 million dollars! Or as Romney calls it “pocket change.”

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Not a big NY Giants fan but almost feeling sorry for Eli. Guy leads his 9-7 team to the Super Bowl, and this week he’s not even the Manning getting the most media attention.

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The NY Post apparently got hold of an email from Tom Brady’s supermodel wife Gisele to her friends and family, talking about how the Patriots “need us more than ever to send them positive energy so they can fulfill their dream of winning this super bowl. [...] I feel Tommy really needs our prayer, our support and love at this time.” Even Mitt Romney says, “Talk about out of touch.”

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The NFL said they will give the 49ers a $200 million loan toward their new stadium in Santa Clara. Some worry when the team moves they will no longer be the San Francisco 49ers. And this could happen. On the other hand, the New York Giants don’t even play in the STATE of New York.

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Mitt Romney now says he misspoke when he said “I am not concerned about the very poor…. I am not concerned about the very rich.” I believe Mitt. I think he is concerned about the very rich. (They need those tax cuts.)

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His ego might be as big as Trump’s. And he’s richer than Romney. But here’s a billionaire I wouldn’t mind seeing some day running for higher office: NY Mayor Michael Bloomberg pledged up to $250,000 to Planned Parenthood to offset funds that were cut by the Susan G. Komen foundation, saying politics have “no place” in health care.

Happy Groundhog Day

February 2, 2012

Punxsutawney Phil woke up early this morning, saw Newt Gingrich and Mitt Romney going at it, and immediately buried himself back in his burrow.

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Actually Phil reportedly was a Donald Trump supporter. The groundhog believes that furry thing that lives on the Donald’s head just might be a relative.

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Susan G. Komen for the Cure just cut all its funding to Planned Parenthood for breast health screenings, after pressure from anti-choice groups. Maybe they should change the color of their pink ribbon to yellow.

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February 1 was “National Signing Day.” (When high school players formally commit to colleges for football.) I think ESPN has created more days and events than Hallmark.

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Tackle Andrus Peat, a “five-star recruit”, today decided on Stanford over previously favored Nebraska. Cardinal coach David Shaw said his and his staff’s reaction “was heard many places around the building.” One would guess the reaction in Lincoln, NE was also heard in many places….

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A new bill, introduced by Florida Rep. State Sen. Michael Bennett tries to enforce a unused 1988 law that says any sports teams that accept public dollars to build their stadiums must shelter poor people on off nights. Off nights? The Tampa Bay Rays have space when they are playing.

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A bronze replica of Ted Williams is being moved from Fenway Park down to the Red Sox Spring Training facility in Florida? No confirmation of rumors that to save shipping costs the team was originally planning just to move Ted’s head.

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Rumor has it that Donald Trump will endorse Newt Gingrich tomorrow. Makes some sense. How often does Trump get to stand on a stage with someone who makes him look like a good husband with a healthy ego?

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Awful story out of Egypt with over 70 people killed at a soccer match. Americans are stunned. They can’t imagine 70 people showing up to watch soccer.

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MSN wonders about the effect of what they call Romney’s “gaffe”: “I’m not concerned about the very poor” will have in the election. “Gaffe?” Might be one of the most honest sentences he’s ever spoken.

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NY Giants DE Osi Umenyiora was fined $20,000 on Wednesday for skipping a mandatory media session at the Super Bowl. $20,000? A lot of NFL players may just start considering this a tax for an extra hour or two of freedom.

(As my friend Blll Dwan says, considering that this fine is about double that of a helmet-to-helmet hit, the incident does point up the NFL’s priorities.)

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Mitt Romney on Wednesday during a CNN interview that he’s “not concerned about the very poor” because they have an “ample safety net” (Either that or they can’t afford to get to the polls.)

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Many pundits are saying that Romney’s win in Florida will give him the nomination. Really, that much importance for a state where most of the residents can’t even figure out when to turn their left-turn blinkers on and off?

Statement from the Susan G. Komen Foundation: “We regret that these new policies have impacted some longstanding grantees, such as Planned Parenthood, but want to be absolutely clear that our grant-making decisions are not about politics.” I think I like “fell into the lifeboat” better.

Pre Pre Big Game Show.

February 1, 2012

Technicially, if you’re not an official sponsor, you’re not allowed to use the words “Super Bowl.” Yeah, hate to put a non-profit like the NFL at risk of losing money.

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Madonna says there will be “no nipple” in her Super Bowl halftime show. Not to say the former Material Girl is getting up there in years but the way NBC will assure this is by only showing Madonna above the waist.

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49ers coach Jim Harbaugh has signed up to play the A T & T Pebble Beach Pro-Am. Which means for the first time, CBS plans to schedule cameras every day on the course for the post-round handshakes.

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The Campaign Media Analysis Group (CMAG) analyzed political ads shown in Florida this past week and said 92% them were negative. As someone who just spent a weekend in Florida I am shocked – 8% were actually supposed to be positive?

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Sarah Palin has been saying “Annoy a liberal, vote for Newt.” Uh, actually not speaking for all liberals, but a number of us would be thrllled to see more in the GOP vote for Newt.

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Gingrich had a robocall in FL saying that as “Gov. of Mass, Romney vetoed a bill paying for kosher food for our seniors in nursing homes. Which meant Holocaust survivors were forced to eat non-kosher, because Romney thought $5 was too much to pay.” Newt may be doing the impossible, making Mitt appear the more likable candidate.

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Newt Gingrich seems like he’s on a mission to make us all forget about that Howard Dean scream.

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Now that the GOP primary is over, Florida residents who want to watch something embarrassing on TV will have to turn back to Orlando Magic games.

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Aaron Rodgers said on a radio interview that he was disappointed in some players’ effort during the Pro Bowl. “I felt like some of the guys on the NFC side embarrassed themselves.” Does that make them all honorary Oakland Raiders?

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This year the New York Giants are in the Super Bowl. Although at 9-7, barely over .500, many think the team didn’t deserve to be in the playoffs in the first place. And really, who does the NFL think it is? The NBA?

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Many changes on high school signing day for college football…. Sounds like some of these prior commitments had all the validity of a Kardashian marriage..

At Newt Gingrich’s Florida “Not-quite-Victory” Party, one of the tunes was “”Hit Me With Your Best Shot” by Pat Benatar Hearing that, Mitt Romney suggested Newt invite Dick Cheney.

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When a company says as part of their hold music-message “Thank you for your patience,” anyone else want to scream at them “What patience, a**holes?”

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Delta Airlines is apparently looking into the possibility of acquiring either US Airways or American. Thereby bringing airline travelers in the United States a step closer to one giant “Take it or Leave it Air Lines.”

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“You might need a life” story: A California woman and about 100 people who are fans of the Facebook game “Frontierville” reportedly posted 1,001,291 comments to a single post in order to break a Guinness World Record.

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From Bill Littlejohn: The Oakland Raiders have hired Greg Knapp as offensive coordinator, a position he held with the team in 2007 and 2008.I guess they want to re-capture the glory days of JaMarcus Russell”


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