The BCS, airline security, and other jokes.

With all the fallout from the Gilbert Arenas gun incident with the Wizards following a card game, the New Jersey Nets informed players that gambling was no longer permitted on team flights. Which is harsh. It’s the only way this year at least some of the Nets were getting a taste of winning.

A Facebook exercise designed to draw attention to breast cancer is requesting women to post their bra color as their status, and then invite their friends to do the same. Not surprisingly, Al Gore posted “green.”

Backup Texas quarterback Garrett Gilbert’s father Gale was actually the Cal quarterback when they beat Stanford on “The Play.” Unfortunately last night Garrett didn’t have the Stanford band to bail him out.

ESPN analysts are saying Boise State has a real chance for next year’s national championship, but it will depend on their pre-season ranking. Ladies and gentlemen, congratulations to the BCS. They have just turned college football into Olympic figure skating.

Jay Leno made a lot of snide jokes tonight about NBC’s possibly cancelling his show. The network might have sued him for libel. But libel requires that the negative comments actually reach an audience.

Curtis Allina, the inventor of the Pez dispenser, died at the age of 87. The funeral will feature a closed top coffin, which will then pop open, then closed, then open, then closed…

The service will be private, but tickets may be available on Ebay.

(explanatory note, Ebay was supposedly founded by a guy who wanted to make it easier for his girlfriend to buy and sell her Pez dispenser connection.)

Former New York mayor Rudy Guiliani appeared on ABC’s “Good Morning America” and praised former President George W. Bush’s record on terrorism over that of President Obama’s. “We had no domestic attacks under Bush; we’ve had one under Obama.” Yes, he said it.

Later apparently, Guiliani corrected himself and said he should have said “Since 9/11.” Oh yeah, that. But, btw, Richard Reed boarded that American flight with his shoe bomb on December 22, 2001.

A Hawaiian Airlines flight to Maui was intercepted by fighter pilots and returned to Portland because of a passenger’s rambling comment card talking about “Gilligan’s Island” with fantasies about Ginger and Mary Ann. Now, I’m no theology expert, but I think it’s a pretty sure bet that the 72 virgins do NOT include Ginger and Mary Ann.

Republican strategist Steve Schmidt, who was engaged in a bitter power struggle with Sarah Palin, now says the former Alaska governor lied on the campaign trail. So as angry as he is, Schmidt is basically conceding Palin showed signs of being able to run for president.

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One Comment on “The BCS, airline security, and other jokes.”

  1. Says:

    Chris Chelios was recently arrested for DUI and speeding. The arresting officer said he clocked him doing 100 mph, although in Chelios’s defense, no chariot can go that fast.

    PS: Hartley read this on his show this past friday

    So ESPN has announced that it will soon be broadcasting games in 3-D. Except for Nets games, which will feature the usual No-D.

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